#INSPIRE

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I think I might have helped someone today. I don't know if I'm the one who did, or someone else, but I did try. And things are okay now.

Let me explain...

I was on my vacation in Florida, sitting on my bed. The Office was on the TV, and I was doing my math packet for school. Suddenly, I feel my phone buzz. I look at the screen, and I realize it was a Wattpad notification. On closer inspection, I see that my ex (and now kinda-sorta friend) posted. I decide to check it out.

I didn't expect to see what I saw. He said that he was really worried for a friend of his, who was talking about ending her life. I instantly got choked up, and offered to help. Her account was in the chapter, so I clicked on it and I messaged her.

At first, I didn't know what to say. I know I've gone through all of this stuff before, but I just didn't know how to handle this. I just said what came from my heart.

I told her about my fight with depression, and how suicide isn't the only way to make things better. I gave her some hotlines to contact, and I tried to give some solid advice.

She thanked me, and soon after, she announced that she would stay on this earth.

I started tearing up again. I remembered how time and time again, I went through that same struggle. In those times, I wished for someone to pull me out of the storm I was stuck in. I wished for someone to just hold me and tell me that everything would be okay. I didn't have anyone to do that for me. My ex left me when I was at the darkest point in my life out of fear, my friends didn't know what to do, my family didn't know. I had no one.

Every time, I would pick myself up. I don't know why, and I don't know how, but something told me to keep fighting.

God, I'm glad I did.

I have amazing friends, family, a boyfriend, and a somewhat stronger mindset.

I like to draw, sing, play ukulele, play piano, watch the Office, swim, go to the park and swing on the swings, hang out with my friends, and live my life. I always think about how I wouldn't have any of this if I gave up yesterday, or the day before that, or last week, and so on.

I've had friends and family end their lives. I think about them every single day. (Miss you Brian <3) I know people would miss me if I ended mine.

I remember watching one of Jaiden Animation's videos, and she said this;

"I consider myself a weak person. I can get knocked down relatively easy, and I knock myself down a lot too.

"We always talk about how strong someone is, but I feel like it doesn't have to matter how strong or weak you are. What matters is that you keep getting back up.

"Something could knock down a weak person and not even affect a strong person, but it doesn't matter how many times you're knocked down, because as long as you keep getting back up, you can keep going."

That's the mentality that I go by.

It doesn't matter how many times you get knocked down, what matters is that you keep getting back up.

That's what fighting depression is all about; depression can slip in and push you down, drowning you in worries and insecurities. All that matters is that you tell yourself, "I'm gonna be okay. These feelings will pass."

If you don't feel okay, don't be afraid to get help from someone you trust. People can pull you out of darkness when you can't climb to the light yourself.

I'm still trying to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's an ongoing struggle. However, I get slightly better every single day, and I think that means something.

Life can get hard (that's what she said), but sometimes you have to make the best of what you have. I did, and I will.

I'm gonna keep living, and my depression isn't gonna change that anytime soon.

Stay strong everyone.