When That's The Last Hope Left (BxB)

Chapter 33

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Being together albeit in secret with Jared was a new, strange thing which made him smile and feel easy-going again, secure.

Being jealous was a new, strange feeling which made him feel uncomfortable and unfair, mean.

He had always had an odd feeling in his gut around Jared and Ze together, but never knew what it was. Now he knew, and he didn't like it at all.

It wasn't as easy as said to hide their just found and confessed strong feelings towards each other.

Two mornings ago, going to school after the weekend, before going in Jared had taken him aside behind a wall where nobody could see or hear them.

"Sweetums, I think it's too much to ask but...you know I can't break up with Ze, not yet. Damn it. Do you trust me?" he had asked, holding Dan's hand for as long as he could before they would go public and see each other properly not until evening. Dan nodded. "Please understand and know I really see her only as a friend. What are you thinking? Tell me."

"Y-you do know you're hurting her, right?" Dan had muttered, not quite sure how he was feeling about this all.

He wasn't an expert on relationships, but he knew this was wrong and cheating her, from both of them.

Nonetheless he trusted Jared almost dangerously much, and he knew his reasons for now. He couldn't just stop and forget this, either.

"I'm hurting her and you, aren't I" Jared had sighed contritely, letting his hand go. This was why he had thought his feelings towards Dan were wrong.

Dan had taken it back, still new to these displays of affection, but didn't want him to feel so bad.

"Don't w-worry about me. I know why you have to do what you n-need to do, and be. I trust you."

"I want to worry about you, sweetums. I don't want to...I can't lose you now when I finally got you, even like this."

Dan had blushed, feeling his emotional gaze pierce right through him.

"Y-you won't."

After that the bell had rang and having gotten the permission the day before, Jared pulled him gently closer and for a quick but special, necessary moment brushed his lips against his boyfriend's.

"It's you I'm thinking about" he whispered, before pulling away and composing himself. "Let's go."

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"Good. The coach is trying to kill us, I swear, but it's worth it in the end" Jared said amused and stood up. "Mum said the dinner is soon ready, so I'm taking a shower and after them, it's finally you and me time."

Dan's eyes subconsciously followed him to next of the door to his bag of clothes and taking his shirt off. Jared smirked, feeling his stare on his bare back, and turned his head.

He had felt or noticed Dan looking at him before, but now they were together so he had the right to tease him about it.

"Like what you see? I might look better after the shower" he said teasingly, making Dan snap his head down to his fidgeting fingers and blush. "I'm sorry, sweetums, I'm just teasing. You have every right to look. Come here."

After hesitating for a few seconds, Dan stood up and shyly walked over to him. Jared lifted his chin and kissed him on the cheek.

"When you're ready I want you to learn not to be embarrassed. I admit I've been checking you out quite a few times, and now there's nothing stopping me."

"T-there's nothing in me to look a-at" Dan whispered blushing more, too embarrassed to speak louder, thinking he was joking.

"Hey, stop speaking like that about my cute and stunning, hot boyfriend" Jared scolded playfully.

He meant what he said, Dan was a bit skinny but that didn't make him any less attractive, and he was eating better so he was getting healthier.

Instinctively, he put his arm around Dan's waist. Even if they were alone, he felt protective over him, now even more and he could express it better.

"I-I'm n-not -"

"Yes, yes you are" Jared interrupted with a smile and connected their lips.

Dan had started to get more confident but they still kept the kisses gentle. Even if he now began to melt into the kiss like always, they couldn't continue for as long as they both wanted.

But just as they were separating, the door opened quietly.

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"Sweetums, are you okay?" Jared asked, putting his arm around his shoulders. Dan nodded. "I can't believe he did that to you. But it's over now, he won't bother us anymore and he knows a bit more again about you and also that you're only mine. He promised not to tell anybody, not even mum, and he'd be in the same boat."

"Good" Dan said, seeming a bit distant.

"Not telling anybody doesn't bother you too much, does it?"

"No. I-I'm not ready to tell anybody y-yet either."

Jared kissed his cheek.

"I'm taking that shower now and then get dinner over with, we need some time together before I have to go."

Dan looked after him leaving the room to go to the bathroom. He couldn't help but think, if he now thought of him differently after Marc had kissed him.

Jared hadn't kissed him after that. Maybe he was just careful, he had freaked out quite good, but he still felt bad about himself. Even if it wasn't directly his fault.

He hoped he would have the courage to ask, before Jared left later to his Friday night party.

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