I loved him

* 42 *

"Mum! Mum! Mhmm mum!" I was woken up by Mitchell shaking me.

I looked at my surroundings. James had found me on the bed with James. Luckily clothes were on and we were far apart.
"honey." I yawned.
"Mom aren't we late for breakfast?"
I checked the time and yawned again.
"Oh, honey. Mum fell asleep. We will have to eat out at a fast food restaurant."

We freshened up and as we made our way out we noticed that they have an all day breakfast at the hotel.

"Look, honey we don't have to leave for breakfast.  They have an all day breakfast."
"An oh-day breakfast? What's that mummy?"
"Honey that is breakfast served for the whole day.  Are you up for it? And it's all-day."
"Yes, mum. Sure."
We walked in and got seated for breakfast. Across our table I could see Lizelle and White.
I pulled my phone out to check for missed calls.  To my surprise Samuel had called. I cleared it from my history and put my phone away. I was not interested.

I must admit, my heart broke a little knowing that the man I loved so much is being cheated by the woman he left me for. She was playing with the only man I had loved.

I smiled at her and she sheepishly smiled back and looked down. She was embarrassed.

Through the day, we had a golf tournament. It was couples day out and we were playing against Lizelle again.

"Wow! Well done baby!" she yelled out
I just smiled.

"He's good right?" she asked me.
"Y-yeah he's good. Are you going to try?"
"I don't know...this tummy is in my way."
"True. Haha I remember when I was also pregnant." I smiled.
She looked down.

"Courtney...I." she stopped halfway and shook her head.

"Come let's go have some drinks." I avoided what she might have wanted to say to me.

Later that night it was couples night again. James and I had grown really close to Lizelle and White. We sat around the dinner table altogether having fun. Then White said something I never imagined. I thought he may have said it because he was drunk the previous night but the second time means something is going on.

"But yeah...we are excited for our baby girl." White said.
James and I paused ,congratulated them with such staleness.

"Wow. Congratulations! Wow!"

Lizelle couldn't stop looking at me. I really did not want to be the bearer of the news to Samuel. He would have to deal with this on his own.

The night was finally over. James went to get Mitchell from the kiddies zone. He was really exhausted. He walked in carrying Mitchell over his shoulder.

"The little solider is exhausted. He is practically snoring."

I walked up to James and kissed Mitchell then James. James put Mitchell down on the bed and I snuggled next to him just to bond with him.

"Mom?" he said in his sleep.
"Baby?"
"Is James my daddy?"

I swallowed my saliva and did not know how to answer him.

"Uhm...baby...James is just a good friend of mommy's."
"Is my dad alive?"
"Baby..." I brushed my fingers through his hair "Your dad is alive. You just don't need him."
He say okay and looked at me.
"So, do I need James?"
"You don't need James but you can show him respect and learn to love him."
"Like I love you."
"Just remember to love mommy more." I chuckled.
He hugged me and kissed my cheek.
"I love you mummy.  You are the best mom and dad any boy could ask for. Goodnight."

I kissed him goodnight and as I turned my head, James was standing at the door with his arms folded.
"I love you too, uncle James." Mitchell said in his sleep.

I whispered to James "how long have you been there?"

I stood up and we went to get ready for bed.