Geekless Love (Book 1)

May 2nd, 2017

-Watch me burn-

Aaron gave me a hug, but I pushed him off. I was sooo done with people in Thomas Jefferson High School. All this school has ever done was bring me down over and over again and I had enough. I was planning on confronting both Max and Tyler. I was tired of it. I don't understand why I didn't move after Julie died. I'm so, so stupid. I'm stupid for ever thinking that someone in this school especially could ever love me. I had no heart left. All of it was broken up and scattered. There was no hope and there was no friends, no family, and no love. I'm burning inside and they're going to feel me once and for all.

I wiped away the tears and told Aaron thank you. "If you need anything, I got you Taytum." I nodded my head and he walked off. I took a deep breath and began walking off. I decided not to talk to Ms. Brogan, because I was not in the mood to be fucked with. Instead, I went to class and sat at the back. My mind was blank throughout the whole lesson in Mrs. Holloman's class. I felt nothing. I just wish that I knew. I just wish that I wasn't so eager to fit in, when I didn't realize that I was only hurting myself.

"Taytum, are you ok?" I looked up at Mrs. Holloman.

I nodded my head and looked back down at my desk.

"Taytum, are you sure? Your face is really red and you're crying."

"I said I'm fucking fine." I got up, grabbed my stuff and walked out the class.

This was the new me and I wasn't going to let anyone stand in my way. When I walked out onto the hall, I saw someone that I couldn't wait to see, Tyler.

"Hey Taytum, what you doing out of class." I stopped two feet away from him. "Taytum, you alright, you're not looking so good."

"Tell me Tyler, would I be looking good in lingerie, maybe in just my bra and under wears?"

"What are you talking about?" He closed his locker.

"Don't...play...stupid...Tyler?"

"Ok Taytum, ha, ha. You got me. Come on, is this some type of joke?"

"Why would this be a joke?"

"You're scaring the shit out of me."

"No, you just killed me."

"Wait, what?"

"The bet, Tyler. You wanna tell me about it?"

I saw Tyler start to sweat. He was playing in his hair looking everywhere else instead of me.

"What bet?" His voice began to quiver.

"Don't lie to me, Tyler. You made a bet about who could be the first guy to have sex with me. And YOU played along with it." I closed my eyes. "You told me you loved me, but really you just killed me. I was never a friend to you, I was merely a sex toy, a piece of meat, and a fucking booty call. You never cared, you never liked me."

"Taytum, now listen..."

"No, you listen. I am not a fallen person, a nerd, a pussy, a bitch, some snuck up whore, and I'm not your punching bag to make you feel good about yourself. I'm tired of fighting to keep my sanity and my life intact, but what's the point in even trying if people like you keep knocking me down. Maybe if I close my eyes, this would all be over."

"Taytum, don't think like that. Don't talk like Julie."

"DON'T YOU DARE SPEAK OF HER NAME! You know, Julie was right. She was right about leaving this place, this earth and I agree with her. I'm so done with this life that I'm living."