On the seventh day of Christmas my true love sent to me seven broken things, six broken lights, five popcorn strings, four shattered snow globes, three cocoa freaks, two bickering singers, and an Axl in a pine tree...
"DUFF JUST PULLED UP!" Steven cheers in harmony with the hum of the garage door opening.
"HE BETTER HAVE BOUGHT FOOD!" Vince demands.
Duff's boot flies through the door and he somehow opens it that way, "Aw crap, okay, uh, what?"
He rips the door off its hinges and struts across the room with a freaking door around his ankle. Duff sets all the grocery bags on the table and Vince starts rifling through them.
"WHERE'S THE FIGGY PUDDING!?" He screams.
"Hold on a sec..." Duff gestures to Vince while Slash tries to get the door off his foot.
"OH NEVERMIND FOUND IT!" Vince takes the pudding. He picks up a fork, examines it, then tosses it over the shoulder, "PROBABLY NEED THAT!"
"Nikki, there's a fork in your hair..." Mick tries to get the fork out, "Where is it? I don't see it..."
"DUDE! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS!? MY HAIR CAN EAT FORKS!" The eccentric bassist runs off to tell Tommy about his fork-eating hair.
"NO WAY DUDE! THAT'S AWSOME!"
"I AM A NINJA MASTER!" Axl announces from the top of the stairs.
"REALLY?" Tommy asks.
"I JUST KARATE KICKED A MIRROR AND I BROKE IT!"
"STOP WATCHING KUNG-FOO MOVIES!" Izzy orders, "THEY ARE LAME!"
"I'M GONNA KARATE CHOP YO FACE IF YA KEEP IT UP!"
"FIGHT ME!"
Axl tries to slide down the stairs, but it snaps under his weight. He falls off the stairs and the railing lands on him.
"Stair railing, 1. Axl, zero." Izzy pushes the railing off him.
"SORRY DUFF I BROKE YOUR PLATE!" Vince holds the two plate fragments.
"Dang it Vince!" Duff facepalms, "Use a fork next time."
"Nikki's hair ate it!"
"Nobody slide down the stairs anymore!" Duff plugs in a brand new lamp.
"NO! BAD BOY!" Izzy chases his dog around the house.
His dog goes under the Christmas tree and knocks three ornaments off it, they shatter. The wild dog rams head on with a vase, which topples into Duff's brand new lamp... They both break.
"CONTROL YOUR MUTT NEXT TIME!" Duff throws his hands on his hair.
"R.I.P. lamp, you will be missed..." Tommy said.
This should be the last rushed-ish chapter, I had three exams today and I have another three tomorrow, then I'm off.
YOU ARE READING
Random Crack Fics of Wings of Fire, Guns N' Roses, & Mötley Crüe
FanficThis is literally just a random book that combines all my fandoms into one. Credit to @JpRafol for giving me this idea. Guns N' Roses: Axl Rose, Slash, Duff Mckagan, Izzy Stradlin, and Steven Adler. Mötley Crüe: Vince Neil, Mick Mars, Nikki Sixx, a...
