Secretly: I love you [COMPLETED]

NINETEEN

The second part of the activity had ended. Jangjun is angry at me since we lose all the games today. He's not talking to me and just leaves me alone every time I insist to talk to him.

It's already dinner time and I tried to find him, unfortunately, I wasn't able to find him. "Looking for Jangjun?" Dongmin asked while smiling at me. "Yes, have you seen him?" He pointed his finger towards the trees, saying "Behind those trees, there's a pond. I saw him sitting there when I passed by." I smiled at him and excused myself for a while. Handling a tray of food, I ran towards his place and ask him to eat. "I don't like to eat so leave."

"You played for a long time, you should regain your..."

"I said leave me alone!" Jangjun shouted, freezing me at my place. A moment later, I grab the tray and went away from him. "He's really angry," I muttered. "He didn't accept it?" Dongmin in front of me asked. I nod. Let's eat it instead. I sighed and smiled forcefully. "Do you like Jangjun?" I choked upon hearing Dongmin's question. He reached out for a bottle of water and gave it to me. "Why did you asked so sudden?" I asked after drinking. "I just noticed that you care for him so much and the way you look at him, it's different." I nudge him. "Enough." He laughed and continued his food.

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The evening is getting deeper but Jangjun is not yet coming to our tent. I've been waiting for him for so long, assuring that he will come back alive but it didn't happen. "Should I ask him to go back?" I whispered under my breath. I took my way to the pond where Dongmin and I saw him a while ago. As I sneak behind the bush, I regretted that time when I decided to fetch him up. My tears made its own way to my lids and started to drop upon seeing Jangjun and Yoojung, hugging each other. I ran away from the scene. My eyes are blurred with tears and I'm just letting my feet to lead my way. "Since when did I told you to give up, huh, Ryu Sujeong?" I exclaimed while repeatedly slapping my head hard. "Don't you understand it?!" I yelled between my tears. "He will not love you, right? He doesn't love and won't love you, stupid!"

Between my cries, the rain started to pour heavily. "Heol! You even joined me in my mourning! You're good!" I sarcastically yelled against the dark sky. I wiped my tears and decided to go back but unfortunately, the pathways are being blurred by the heavy rain.

"I think I'm lost." I uttered shivering. As I walk, I saw a huge tree that can be a shelter for the meantime. I stopped and curled up to keep my body warm.

I stared at the dark sky, saying, "Why are you making it hard for me? If I didn't deserve to live, just take away my life from me... so I could rest from these burdens." I bowed while weeping. "I really don't think I deserve to live..."

I heard a familiar voice, saying, "You do deserve to live." Gradually, I lifted my head and there I saw an unexpected person, it's Dongmin. I wept as I saw him smiling. A smile that gives me hope. "Dongmin-ah..." I hugged him. "I thought I will be staying here forever." I uttered between my sobs. "I won't let that happen." He rested my head on his chest. "Why did you run here?" With his question, I suddenly remembered the scene where Jangjun and Yoojung are hugging each other. "Let's not talk about it for now. I want to go back." Dongmin sighed defeatedly. He held my hand and lead me back to our tent.

The rain already stopped and I also bid my goodbye to Dongmin. He still wants to check me as I sleep but I pushed him away because I want to be alone. I lay down on my blanket. "Move on, Sujeong. You need to understand that Jangjun will never love you." I closed my eyes, I finally drifted into a deep sleep.

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"No one will love you so you better kill yourself!" My own mother shouted to me. I couldn't stop crying, I don't know why but everybody is against me. "You should kill yourself!" My father added. "Go kill yourself now! We want to see you hanging in death at that rope!" Jangjun shouted while pointing out the rope at the ceiling. Out of nowhere, my brother, Booseung carried me like a sack of rice and let me stand above the chair and inserted my head into the rope. "Go die!"

"1... 2... 3!" In a flash of lightning, someone kicked the chair where I was standing, making the rope tightens around my neck.

"Sujeong!"

"Sujeong!" I aggressively sat as I opened my eyes. "It's a nightmare..." I weep as I see myself alive and breathing. "It's a nightmare..." I cried and someone just hugged me. "It's okay, I'm here." Within his hug, my emotions settled down. I felt secured within that arms.

"You have a high fever." His soft voice that I've been longing, speaks. "It's okay, It's better to die. My life is meaningless." I released myself from his arm and lies down again. "I won't let that happen." His soft voice covered my ears and I felt something soft that touches my cheek.

Right before letting myself drowned, I heard words like I was dreaming. "You don't know how I feel."

"You just don't know... that secretly, I love you." That whispered words getting me drowned in a deep sleep. This would be a great dream... for me.

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AUTHOR'S NOTE:
ASDFGHJKL AFTER 123456789 YEARS I FINALLY GOT MY CHANCE TO UPDATE THIS STORY! I'M REALLY SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT. IT'S JUST, I'M SO BUSY WITH MY STUDIES SO I WASN'T ABLE TO UPDATE THIS EVEN IF I WANT TO. I HOPE YOU'LL UNDERSTAND AND YOU'LL STILL CONTINUE TO SUPPORT THIS STORY TILL THE END! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! 😘