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Park Jimin came back in Seoul as a model, singer, actor superstar and a successful novelist. After resigned on his job he went to L.A. to forget all things about in Seoul. He leave the country for good pero hindi niya akalain after five years babalik siya successful on his new career.
Ngayon nasa isang showbiz talk show siya will gonna talk about his successful career in foreign country and promoting his upcoming book signing.
Kanina pa siya kumakaway at ngumingiti sa mga fans niya na walang humpay na nagsisigaw simula ng pumasok siya ng set.
"Wow. So this is the power of Park Jimin?" Pag-amuse ng host na si Kim Jisoo. "And Armys are so hype!" Saka ito nakangiting humarap sa celebrity.
"What is the feeling finally after five years you're back in own country? pero bago mo iyun sagutin, there's a rumor kaya ka daw matagal nakabalik dahil may naalala ka, something a not good memories? So what is your speculation about on this?"
Jimin's eyes began searching in the audience. He see Hoseok with her girlfriend Jennie both holding a big banner smiling widely, Namjoon and his husband Kim Seokjin with their adopted pretty daughter, Namjin. His gaze paused at an empty seat. A seat reserved for the older. Jimin knew that seat will be empty at the first place but as he see the vacant seat, he see Min Yoongi seating there wearing its signature beige trench coat, widely grinning happily waving its pale veiny hand and says 'hey cutie pie!'
He blink as he feel warm heats starting to build up.
"I'm happy to be back." He answered in raspy voice due a bitterness he feel inside of his throat. "About on rumor, you did job very well whoever you are. You did well caused its true."
The crowd sudden filled of surprise reaction but some, acting surprise.
"Yes, I leave this place thinking I leave also those memories but---hahaha! hahaha!!" Jimin laughed. "Little I didn't know naisama ko pala ng umalis kaya bumalik ako dito para ibalik ang mga iyun."
His friends remain silent on their seats, waiting on Jimin's words.
"I hate him." A distraught three words escape from his mouth. "I should..."
I should hate him but I can't.
Hoseok on his seat telling also the same words of celebrity. "fck Yoongi hyung. You're the greatest liar I've ever known. I punched you thinking to wake you up from his cheat b-but shit fcking shit---Tae had never cheated on you. How Tae could do that if he never exist in the first place?"
"I hate him caused he's good writing a great story. Sa ganda ay pwedeng-pwede niya akong agawan ng career as novelist."
but instead I misses him after..
Everyone starting to confuse except those four people.
Kahit gusto ng magtanong ng host sa celebrity ay hinayaan na lamang nito magpatuloy na magsalita since maging siya ay bigla din na intriga.
"Kung maging novelist man siya, this will be his plot. He will be the protagonist of his own story. Having a mental disorder and his story in the first page will be starts at 'Dear Jimin'".
I finished read his letter inserted between pages of my book.
"Writing at the age of fifteen, he left his hometown Daegu going to Seoul with his dream to become a music writer, composer, producer but his life in city has been difficult. Many music companies and entertainments rejected his songs beginning of his downward spiral's life experiencing too much depression, anxiety and social withdrawal."
"In the middle, he will write he met two persons also have the same wavelength of him in music behalf having a social withdrawal he still make up friends. At the same time, he began can't able to recall some things, mostly forgot some events and become uncleared because of his dissociation. Disconnected from real life which is outcome of him being psychotic. He thought his father disagreed on his dream but the truth is matagal ng tanggap ng ama niya ang pangarap na gusto niyang makarating but due to his dissociation, his memory didn't stick in his mind. Ang pumapasok sa isip niya ay tutol parin ang ama niya sa pangarap niya."
"because of anxiety, depression and dissociation making him less alive and there a guy named Kim Taehyung appeared. His five years relationship boyfriend only makes him alive but the real thing is, Taehyung just his hallucinations. Yes, all he thoughts he just depressed but he didn't know he began experiencing some symptoms of a psychotic person, knowing it was too late. But despite he knew that his mind and eyes tricked him---just he can't sank in his brain what is real and what is not. In the end, he believed Tae was real."
"In the last page, he will write having too much believing Taehyung's presence always with him, stealing his all attention making that night... that night he didn't notice a guy across in front of him. He hit that guy. He killed that guy who's chasing for its boyfriend's explanation why it was suddenly breaking up with him. But the funny thing is, he forgot the accident why? Dissociation."
"Dissociation of being psychotic."
"He suddenly didn't shown up at the bus stop after he remembered the car accident because of too much ashamed on himself. He didn't know how to face the boyfriend of the guy he killed which is become his bus stop pal and writing a an apologizing letter he can do. Wasted his bright blue ink pen and paper and his money for shipping fee to delivered in foreign country together the book only he only can do."
"I should really hate him sabi ko nga magaling siya gumawa ng istorya. His story was really really really great kaya nga nagagalit ako sa kanya ngayon. His plot really so believing, looks like based in true life." Jimin laughed. "He made me cry.. so much. He's story too much for angst."
"Kaya nga gustong-gusto ko rin siyang makita para pasalamatan sa sobrang galing niya dahil maging ako talagang naniwala at humanga sa kanya. He made cried Park Jimin so much in the middle of night and... also." Intently looked at rolling camera.
"asking his permission if this great story of him can I use for my upcoming book to be publish soon in titled 7:00 A.M. That.. That---empty seat I only reserved for him. Sadly he wasn't today. Still okay. I already expect this."
"He is my memories about his great story don't take it seriously guys nadala lang ako sa pagiging writer but whoever you are who spreading first this rumor it is true but in your speculation it wasn't not good memories? Sorry babe, you got a wrong one here. It wasn't good memories caused it was my best memories."
"Better luck next time."
"Asking who is he and for the reason why he's my memories na gusto kong ibalik dito? Lets keep it private. Iwan niyo na iyun sa akin."
"Now, can we about my book signing since that rumor I already cleared up?"
*
Jimin keep signing his published books at almost straight two hours, he can't deny that he can't feel the numb and tired of his right hand.
Nangangalay na rin ang balikat niya at nangangawit na rin ang likuran niya at pwet sa kakaupo na walang ginawa kundi ubusin ang laman ng kanyang marker pen.
Pero ang pila ay hindi umiikli mas nagdadagan pa.
"Jimin, I think kailangan na natin magcut-off para kasing hindi umiikli ang pila at isa pa para makapagpahinga kana rin."
"I'm okay Namjoonie. Hindi tayo magka-cut off. I don't want having a bad impression to my fans. Nagtiyaga silang pumila kaya matiyaga din akong pipirma."
"Sige tutal book signing mo naman yan."
Jimin was about to sign the next book as the beige trench coat come on his sight, he quickly looked up. The boy smiled at him.
