the type of pain and loneliness that you felt at that moment in time was one that you would never wish on anyone. and although you wanted to tell zion about what had happened, you just didn't want to compromise his happiness and make him feel the way you did.
so you kept it from him.
for two months you kept the fact that you had a miscarriage from him because to you, it was like a "what he doesn't know won't hurt him" type situation and because of that, you beared the pain for the both of you.
but the guilt of keeping something so big away from him ate away at you. how you were able to wake up next to him and essentially act happy when in reality, you felt horrible was beyond you.
"zion, i've got something to tell you" he looked up from his phone, a small smile gracing his face when he saw you.
you climbed onto the bed and sat facing towards him with your legs crossed.
"what's up babe?"
you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth and looked at the wall behind zion. right now, it seemed more interesting than anything at this point.
taking a deep breath you began talking.
"a few months ago, i went to the doctors a lot and i wasn't feeling very well" zion knitted his eyebrows and looked at you confused. but he hesitantly nodded his head for you to carry on.
"the tests weren't actually what i said they were for. they were pregnancy tests and they came back positive"
zion looked at you stunned and sat his phone down next to him.
"you're pregnant?" he sounded unsure yet excitement was laced through his tone which only added to the hurt you were feeling.
tears pooled at the brims of your eyes and you dropped your head slightly so you were looking at your hands that were twisted together.
"i was. i uh-" the tears streamed down your face like a waterfall and there was no way you could stop them. the words became stuck in your throat and you found it hard to get them out.
but zion caught on. he understood what you were trying to say.
"you miscarried didn't you?" looking up at zion, the tears in your eyes blurred him but you could still make out his expression.
you nodded your head while repeating "i'm sorry" over and over again. you didn't know what else to say or what to do.
you weren't sure if zion was angry with you but you definitely could feel the sadness radiating from him.
"i wanted to tell you but i didn't want you to feel the pain that i did- still do. i'm so sorry z"
"shhh baby girl. you've done nothing wrong" zion leaned forward and wrapped you up in his arms, pulling you into his chest.
a huge weight felt as though it had been lifted from your shoulders. you told him and he didn't react negatively like you had imagined.
"i should've told you" you managed to choke out.
pulling away, you looked at zion and saw the tears that had escaped his eyes also. you used your thumb to gently wipe them away before zion placed a kiss on your forehead.
"you did what you thought was right and i can't be mad at that. i wish you told me sooner so you didn't have to go through all that alone"
zion sat with you, wiped your tears away and held you in his arms. he wanted to make sure that you didn't feel that loneliness that you've felt for months. he want to take away that pain you've beared for the both of you.
and although you felt like you were the weakest person ever, zion couldn't help but think of how you were one of the strongest woman he's ever met.
•••
kinda sucky, kinda sad, kinda short. but those are my specialty 🤷🏽♀️
also THANK YOU FOR THE 40k, 1k VOTES & GETTING THIS BOOK FROM #135 TO #35 IN RANDOM.
I WOULDN'T BE HERE WITHOUT YALL!!!
