Saved by Gaga

{10}

This is a major result, all I want to do is stay with Joanne. We say goodbye to the other 3 and all say we will see each other soon. If I'm honest I don't know if I trust this because I don't know if Joanne will stay. If she stays I might see them soon. If she goes I will never see them again. I love her but I never trust people very easily especially when they say they'll always be there or something like that. Its not often true. After they leave I sit with Joanne for a bit. Just in the garden with the buzz of the road that's far off and the summers haze. I then cry. She knows why she hugs me harder and strokes my hair. The way mum spoke about me. The whatever at the end. She always used to promise that she would always love me and always care. That was when I was 7 years old. I just feel lost and thrown away.

"It's okay, it's ok. I've got you I'm not going. I love you and I'm staying."

"I'm so sorry about what my Mum said. It's not true she doesn't understand. She can only see the top layer. Like lots of people who never understand the second half of everything." I say after the tears have gone. I had pull myself together I know that there are so many people in my life. I'm ok again.

"Hey it's fine. I am used to it because really I don't wear that many clothes. Let's be honest you have seen that photo shoot I did without any clothes on. Only my hands to cover me. And I do sing about sex but all the little monsters know it in a different way to others. You all get it and that's all I need. You guys mean the world to me. Parents have said things like that to me before. But it was out of care for there kids. I explain everything else to them and why it's like that. Then they get it. But I have a feeling your Mum did not want that. She only wanted a excuse to have you unhappy and home." She says back.

"My mum's a nice person she loves my sister to the end of the world and she is kind and compassionate. But not to me. She hates me. I'm just a bad kid I suppose. I don't misbehave at school or anything. I'm just not want she wanted. And if it's not want you want then you should get rid of it right? "I say back with a sad smile.

"No don't think like that Millie. You don't get rid of people. Ever. Come on let's go home. You need to eat and so do I. " Joanne says.