The door is slightly ajar when I arrive at it and only thoughts of my utmost fears flood my mind and soon it's all I can see, until I hear his softly groan in anger. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to wake you." I mumble shutting the door softly and shutting off a few of the lights I'd turned on. I take the heels I wore off and try not to draw to much attention to myself. I had to tell him we were watching movies in Lucy's room because they were taking me into one of the cities around and I didn't want him to know. I should've told him but I didn't know what to say and I didn't want him to get mad. "I'm going to take a quick shower." I whisper kissing his cheek and he grabs my arm quickly. "Do you not approve of my hygiene?"
"Don't go into the bathroom, please." He begs and I roll my eyes kissing his cheek yet again before I walk off. "Cameron." He sighs while I look in at the barely lit room, the candles he had are dead or dying the rose petals are all dark looking and wilted and the big box in the middle looks like it's died too.
"Was, was this all for me?" I smile softly while he groggily walks into the bathroom blowing out the last two candles flicking on the light sweeping the rose petals off draining the bath and taking his gifts out.
"Take your shower," he shoos and throws the box down, I can hear something smash and he lays himself back down, but this time in the second bed we have in our room. He holds the pillow and throws his head against it multiple times before he can find comfort.
"Wanna come with me? I know it's late but." He huffs into the pillow and turns his back to me. "Tomorrow will be all about you baby I won't go with them again I promise." I kiss his head trying not to trigger anything to major. With TBI anything could trigger him and then he gets mad and throws things and me because I'm small enough. He'll brake things and scream a lot I don't want that I just want cuddles but those might be too much for him.
"You promised a make up trip, but non of this says couples get away." He shakes his head, he's so mad at me.
"It's still my birthday, for five more minutes and you wouldn't yell at your birthday girl." I give him a light smile but he looks anything less than amused.
"I don't have a birthday girl to yell at." He growls a little and I gasp I shock.
"Of corse you have a birthday girl to yell at, you can't dump me on my birthday that's not right." I pout and he nods with a sad look staring at the clock, it's eleven fifty nine. I know the girls are staring through the window and I hope they know that this is their doing. But I suppose it's partially mine too for ignoring him.
"It's not your birthday anymore sweetheart." He kisses my forehead while I start shedding all of my tears he holds me against his shoulder and carefully rocks me. "We should take time from each other, I won't propose a divorce because that will ruin our kids. But I do think that I should head home." He's become much more calm which means the worst is yet to come.
"Why would you head home?" I pout looking at the two perfectly made beds minus the one pillow only slightly out of place. "We haven't had sex once." I tease and he shakes his head.
"I'm not staying for the fake laughs, or the sex, I'm staying because I have kids that are only little and need both of us." My eyes fill with tears again and I stand at the door to the bathroom.
"It was so pretty Shawn, it was just a beautiful, beautiful setup and I'm really sorry that I didn't get to go through all of the things you had planned for me." I turn and fluff his hair leaning in for a kiss and he steps back I can hear the girls gasp.
"I'm going to bed," he nods walking away. "Sleep well." He nods laying in the farther of the two beds.
"I love you baby, I'll see you in the morning." I follow him and kiss his cheek before he can ward me off.
"Stop loving me, please just stop loving me and make my life easier." He plays with strands of my hair. "It's not easy to fall out of love with perfection." He smiles.
"Then don't, I'll change, I'll fix this mess." I grab his hands and beg. "I will get onto my knees for you, just please tell me you'll forgive me."
"I miss the sex," he whispers. "I miss the hugs, and the sneaky seductive kisses, I miss the sleepless nights." He sighs. "I want someone who will give me sleepless nights."
"I gave you all of those sleepless nights, those are our sleepless nights." I beg laying my body on top of his. He doesn't like it he just doesn't but he's accepting it. He's giving me all that I can take while I can still take it.
"But you couldn't do it again," he argues only embracing me when I force him to.
"I would do all of this over if it means longer with you."
