seanathan leward imagines:)

imagine 7; a change of perspective

Sean's POV:

i was running. i knew exactly where. o don't know why. i never know why. it shouldn't upset me. it should never effect me like it does. she always does the same thing.

but as i knocked on y/n's door and she opened it all i could feel was her. she was always there. she always been the girl i compared all the others to.

"kaycee again?" she asked saddened. i didn't notice i was crying until now. i nodded.

i ran into her arms and let out all of my feelings.

she was my pillow.

she led me to the couch and sat down. i laid across the couch with my head resting on her legs. she played with my hair. i like it when she does that. it calms me down.

"what did she do this time Sean?" she asked gently but i could sense the anger in her voice. but i ignored it i knew she'd understand either way. even if she gets heated she's always sweet to me.

"she acted like she didn't know me. probably not on purpose. but if she really cared she'd probably make it a point to recognize me." i explained.

i've always liked Kaycee. she had this beautiful glow about her. bit she never seemed to care about that. she had her own life. we've always been friends but she didn't care if i had feelings or not.

y/n's always here. "i've told you multiple times sean you have to get it through your head that she doesn't care about you like i do. she'll always be your friend but she doesn't feel the same. kaycee is my best friend. but you don't deserve this hurt." she's always here.

her fingers glided through my hair again and she sighed.

"i know i should get over it. but i think I'm falling for her. do you understand how difficult it is to love someone who doesn't know your falling for them?" i explained.

she sighed again. "sean you have no idea do you?" she's always calm but she looked hurt right. and i don't understand.

"no idea about what?" i asked. then i put it together as she kept quiet, refusing to look me in the eyes.

she's always here. she is always here. she's always cared. she's sweet to me. she listens to me and she touches me whenever i'm comfortable with it. she cares about my opinion and she never looks bad when i plan to see her even when she's not feeling up to looking good. she's beautiful. she's funny. she's intelligent. she's herself. she has empathy.

"oh my god." was all i could say. i sat up.

she still didn't say a word.

how did i not know this before?

"y/n do you have feelings for me?" her eyes closed and she tilted her head back. i pulled her face back to look at me.

a small tear strolled down her face and i wiped it away.

"whydidn't you just tell me?" she cried more.

"no please stop. don't cry over me. you don't deserve that." i said as tears rolled down my cheek.

"and you don't deserve being hurt by kaycee. it hurts so bad Sean. i know you love kaycee. and i can't have you." she said through her tears. i hated being the one who hurts her.

"howthe hell am i supposed to handle this? because all i can think right now is of you. all i've been thinking about lately is you. and right now as i look at you all i can think is of you and how even when your crying so calmly your still gorgeous to me. and how much you're different from Kaycee." i didn't know what i was saying. i knew i meant it. i knew i meant it. i didn't know it until now.