seanathan leward imagines:)

imagine 8; false hopes

Sean's POV:
I don't know how i got here. I don't understand what's happening. One second we're fighting and swearing like sailors but the next we're making out like it's no big deal.

I hate her. And i know she hates me.

But something about her is just so interesting.

Like the way she pushes me away. The way she's flirtatious and says she doesn't know it. The way she just casually kisses me and for some damn reason everything floats away.

It's the weirdest thing to think I'm attracted to her.

She's perfect i don't know why i hate her. She's different. Unlike others. Which is why she's so addictive.

If she wasn't so stubborn and clever i wouldn't be this drawn to her. The way she kisses me is like she's afraid to. But she knows she wants to. And it's like she's scared of something.

But i know every time i pull her closer she feels safer.

She's impeccable. The way her hands move as if they have a mind of their own. The way she's so down to earth and humble even when she's amazing at everything you could think of.

I can't see why she can't see herself being with me. Maybe it's because I'm different. And i am. I'm not the outgoing, confident man she needs. And i may not be the best looking but i have such a strong drive for her and what she can do that i feel like I'd be able to carry her heart.

'She doesn't trust me' i kept telling myself.

'It'll never happen'

'She's too good for you'

'Get out of your head numbskull this isn't real for her like it is for you'

'You know what? Fuck it I'm gonna say it.'

I had to pull away. I can't hide this.

She looked concerned . "What Sean? What's wrong?" She quietly asked so she didn't startle me.

Which she couldn't. But that's how she feels when she's with me. Scared, and i don't want that.

"I think I have feelings for you." I said. Still she was shocked. She pushed me away.

Which i expected.

"What do you mean Sean? You hate me. And it's so confusing. But every time i see you I'm drawn to you. And i hate it because i can't be with you." She explained. I could feel the freight in her face.

"Why? Why can't we be together? You know you want me! And you know i want you! What the hell is keeping you away from me? You can't kiss me like that and expect me not to fall for you!" I raised my voice. She stepped back. She was still shocked.

"Why me, Sean?" She gently asked confused. She grabbed my hand but didn't lace our fingers. She's too scared.

I grabbed her face. "Why are you scared of me?" I can't let this go. If she knows I'm attracted to her why is she still timid about me?

"Because Sean you fall for every girl you meet. I know you don't just date every girl. But you fall too easily. It's hard for me to believe it's real." She said closing her eyes.

I have to say it.

"Listen to me y/n okay? Your right. I'm not a fuckboy. I'm too sensitive. And i know you feel like i can't seem to find the right thing. Or the right time. Or the right place. Or the right girl. But your different. I know i could say that to anyone. But it's true okay? I'm falling in love with you."

I am?

"You are?" She's so afraid.

How can i stop it? I want to care. I want to comfort her. How can i change this?

She likes to be hugged. She said she does. I can always try.

So i hugged her.

"I know it feels like it's not real. But i swear when I'm with you? Nothing has to be real because i know you are." I whispered through her beautiful hair. She took a deep breath and her arms gently hooked around my neck.

She rested her head in my chest and i could feel the tensity go away.

She's all i want and she doesn't even know it. And she still can't trust me.

"Talk to me y/n." I hope she will.

She looked up at me and smiled. We walked over to the couch and she laid her head on my lap.

She fiddled with my finger while i played with her hair and rested my arm on the top of the couch.

"I can never hate you anymore. It's like this chemical thing when I'm with you. It's not hate anymore. I want you to be mine but it's like there's no way it can happen because i feel like it's fake." She said quietly.

I gripped tighter onto her soft hands and kissed her forehead. "Sweetie i just told you i love you. It can't get any more real than that." I whispered.

"Where did this even come from?" She asked.

I was thinking the same thing.

"My heart i guess. I couldn't hide it anymore. I didn't have the courage to say anything before because i wasn't sure if it was the right time. Or if you even felt the same. Which i still haven't gotten an answer to. But no rush." She giggled and kissed me gently.

"I love you sean. You know i love you." Gosh i love her. Where did this come from?

I guess love takes time to reveal itself.

"Thank God." I said relieved.

If love is what she needs it's what she'll get. I love her. So I'm gonna love her forever. Until she burns it out.

She's my love.
————————————————————————A/N:

Hii lewsers. Sorry this isn't my best. But I'll try to get better. Let me know in the comments what you think. I love you guys❤️ until next time...

Lots of love..., your author...Sydney☺️💝💍