[AustinCarlile] Live Forever

[AustinCarlile] Live Forever [ChapterTwo]

Author's Note:

So, I met Of Mice & Men on Friday. It was the best moment of my life. They were all so sweet. And, Austin watched a video that Vincent made him. I babysit Vincent, he's autistic, we sing 'My Understandings' together. And Shayley wasn't there, so Austin was next in line. Plus, he likes Austin's tattoos. Anyway, this one is a filler. I know, the second chapter shouldn't be a filler. But, stay with me because Austin will be in the next chapter and things will all go from there. I promise.

“So, did you talk to him?” Tatum is nosy, knows everything about me, and wants to know every detail of everything that I do that could possibly entertain her, but that’s why I love her, because she cares, she has an interest in my life. Nudging me with her elbow as the two of us walk around the parking lot, weaving through the lines of buses, not really having a destination, not really knowing where we are headed, but just walking. She’s been my best friend since we were kids, and somehow along the way she met Matt, separating the two of us from each other for long periods of time until we’re both finally free at the same time, after months of not seeing each other. Matt is considering her as his assistant now, that she works under him, but she doesn’t, she never has and she never will, not that she’s controlling or wears the pants in their relationship, but they're too perfect for each other to have one person be above the other – even in work.

Rolling my eyes, I run a hand through my hair, my other hand hitting against my thigh, the water bottle in my hand hitting my skin, the shorts I'm wearing only for now, only to walk around in, behind the scene, not to wear on stage, simply because I hate how I look in shorts. “I don’t know. It was so weird. She was all over him. I was just there. He was trying to talk to me, I guess. But, according to Hunter, I bolted after the interview was over. It was just so awkward. And, remember when we were in high school, how we would always meet the band guys and be disappointed. I'm not ready to be disappointed. It would be a long tour of listening to nothing.”

I know what she’s going to say, I know her, inside and out, but I don’t know if I know her as well as Matt does, and the two of us have known each other for years. It sucks, knowing that I'm no longer the person who knows everything in someone’s life, like I've been pushed aside, but that’s never her intention, and I couldn’t be happier for her, for the two of them. “You do realize that if he was trying to talk to you, then he’s trying to get to know you.” She talks slowly, pronouncing every word, annunciating every syllable, as if she’s trying to explain this to a child.

Crossing my arms over my chest, the water bottle resting against the old, cut, turn Guns ‘N Roses shirt, I shrug my shoulders, biting my lower lip as I loll my head back, my eyes burning as the sunlight shines down, strongly. “Can we talk about something else? Like, how am I supposed to travel to Canada? Tatum, I can’t leave the country. What if something goes wrong? Then I have to deal with customs and that takes so much longer.” I worry, I worry a lot, about a lot of things, things that affect me directly and indirectly, things that don’t really affect me at all. The guys tell me I have to stop, but there’s so much that I can’t change and that scares me.

“Devon, are you serious? That’s, like, a month away. You never know how much better things will get.” She doesn’t want to say it, doesn’t want to bring it up, but there isn’t anyone around us, and sometimes I just want to talk about it, no one understands that, and I won’t be the one to bring it up. “Anyway, I want to hear about it, all of it. Did she even ask you anything good?” Turning her head to the side to look at me, she raises her eyebrow, the sun shining down on her tanned skin, making it glow.