[AustinCarlile] Live Forever

[AustinCarlile] Live Forever [ChapterTwentyOne]

Author's Note:

So, I want to make this girl have an important role, so you'll read about her later on in the story, too. And don't worry, Devon will eventually tell Austin about her brother. Well, actually, that's not entirely true, but he does know and she does know that he knows. Ugh, I'm so excited to write it. Anyway, sorry for the wait, I made this longer than usual because of the wait. Um, hopefully things are making sense. No more Adam drama after this for a while. Things will be smooth sailing, until She Who Shall Not Be Named shows up. Oh yeah, it's happening.

I want to convince myself that telling Phil was a smart thing to do; that if I didn’t things would get complicated, that nothing would be able to just dissipate, that if I told him he wouldn’t feel the need to tell Austin that I was a bitch. I'm not stupid, I know I'm not the nicest, I have my moments, I like my privacy, I don’t find a lot of the things my fans find funny to be entertaining. He didn’t deserve my rudeness, he just caught me at a bad time, asked about someone who was flirting with my boyfriend, it all was too much and he was the one I verbally vomited on.

“I think he hates me.” Crossing my right leg over my left, I place my hands atop my thigh, sighing softly as I look up at her from my seat, watching her as she sits down on the table behind her. Tilting her head to the side, she shrugs her shoulders, knowing everything, I told her what happened, I came here, I didn’t want to tell Nate, didn’t want to tell the other guys, I just wanted to tell a girl, someone who knows me, and she knows me. “Blaze, he swore that he wouldn’t tell Austin what I told him, but what if he tells him that I'm a bitch?”

Running a hand through her hair, she shakes her head, rolling her eyes; there’s no one around, that’s part of the reason I came here, people are scarce, she’s supposed to be packing up, but sometimes it’s just nice to talk where we know no one who knows us will come. “I highly doubt that Phil is going to say something. Alan said that Austin is really happy that you’re his girlfriend and that the guys don’t want to ruin his happiness.” The two of them, her and Alan, they need to get together, I think it’s the cutest thing; they're so perfect for each other, I keep telling her that he clearly likes her back, but she won’t listen.

Chewing on my lower lip, I groan, leaning back, the warm metal of the chair hitting against my back, and I run a hand through my hair. It’s nice to hear that he’s happy, because I'm happy, he’s amazing, I like us, I just don’t like all the add-ons, the girls who flirt with him, the comments people make, it’s none of their business. There’s nothing wrong with a girl idolizing him and crying when she meets him, I love that, I love that girls have a positive male figure in their lives, but the girls who solely want to hit on him and try to get him to flirt back, it’s uncomfortable for me.

Granted, no one knows, well, people know, the people we’re touring with, our band members, those people know, but the fans don’t know, they only assume. That’s what I want, I don’t want them to know, there’s really no need for them to know, it’s my private life, I get that, that they don’t know about it, there’s no way for them to know about it, but even if they did there would still be those girls who just want to attempt to sleep with him.

“Blaze, you don’t understand, though. I was so mean to him. I even told him that I'm not a nice person.” Maybe I'm overreacting, Phil did promise not to say anything, but that was pertaining to my brother, he seems like a nice guy, understanding, he has to have realized that I'm not always like that, I'm rarely like that, I may not be extremely social, but I sure as hell am not that cold. “He was so shocked. And Austin’s dad is here! What if Phil says something in front of his dad and then his dad starts to hate me? You know how important his dad is to him.”