Remember// C.H

9) Dark

~Brooklyn

That' evening I returned home. I guess you couldn't say it was the evening because it was around 2:00 in the morning.

Calum's words have had me thinking a lot, and I know he doesn't want to come to the fact, that if I date him, or move our relationship further, I'll hurt him, his career, his fans, and his band mates.

I never knew what 5 days could do to a person.

Him liking me after 5 days, I'm not even interesting. I don't know what he see's in me.

I'm just a girl who doesn't get around much, trying to find her place in the world.

I always thought that the world or universe had something in store for me. But I guess not.

Then again, how would I know. I'm only seventeen, figuring out who, and what I want to be.

Most people figured this out in kindergarten, and always had their heart set, on what they want to do, but obviously I'm a late comer. When my teachers always asked me what I wanted to do, or be I guess I said 'I don't know' or something stupid like that.

Calum's lucky.

He know's what he wants to do, or become in his life, and I'm sure he's going to get there. He's famous.

Me on the other hand, I am nothing.

I work at a job that barely gives me any pay, and I am never happy.

Sometimes I wish I had it easier.

I take that back. Some people in the world are probably starving, and homeless, or don't have a job, or the things that I have. That was selfish of me.

I laid in my bed looking up at the ceiling, just thinking.

I have no emotions right now, just wishes and prayers.

"You know, I just want to hear your name and not feel anything"Calum's words played over and over in my head.

Maybe Calum really does like me. I'm a bitch to him anyways, but he still stays, and always seems interested to talk to me. But then again, what does he see in me. Out of all the girls screaming his name, at his concerts, or shows. Why me?

Or, let's face the obvious. He's probably going to play me like any other guy I've been with. I'm not trying to be cliché at all, but I fall for the bad boys, and bam. It blows up in my face like usual.

Calum's not a bad boy, or at least for what I've discovered. He's somewhat interesting, but a jerk at the same time. Maybe some of Luke's ass-hole-ness runs in the band.

Michael, and Ashton don't seem that way only Luke.

I scrunched my nose at the thought of Luke.

The first night I met him, I was trying to be nice, but he wants to be a total ass. The next day, he wants to apologize, and be like 'can we be friends' or whatever.

Even though he apologized to me, you only get one first impression.

Suddenly my phone rang. I rolled over and took the phone off of the charger, and looked at the caller ID. Calum.

"What do you want?" I asked

"Nothing, just wanted to know if you made it home okay" he said

"Yeah, I'm fine." I said.

"Okay, great. " he paused. "Brooklyn, you were really quiet around the time we were leaving earlier"

"Really, I was?" I asked.

"Yeah, if any thing is wrong you know you can talk to me right" he said.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine" I said.

"Alright, just checking. Goodnight"

"Night" I said.

I've finally came to my senses. The reason I am pushing him away is because

I, Brooklyn Decker, am falling in love with Calum Hood.

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