Time Bomb •ch•

36. Numb

I'm finding myself in another one of those situations where I am alone staring at my ceiling...again. Not by choice, Calum's the one that told me not to do anything till he got back from his place because I might hurt myself again.

Speaking of Calum. Fuck, I don't even know what to do with myself when I'm around him. All I ever find myself doing is smiling and laughing. I don't think I have ever been so happy around one person before. Yet I still am lost. It seems like humanity has given me many signs as to why we can't be together.

It hurts so much to know that all this happiness will have to end soon. I still can't help but want him so bad. I know he is good for me but I don't deserve to be happy, he does and that means a life without drama, a life without me.

Suddenly I heard my front door open and then slam shut. I sat up in my bed knowing it was probably Calum. A couple seconds later Calum appeared in my door way but for some reason he looked angry. We stared at each other for a second.

"Why did you lie to me?!?" Calum said sternly. I looked at him completely shocked.

"Your dad is not dead. Why did you lie to me?" He said more calmly and started walking towards me. I just stared at him fighting for any words I could scrape up.

"I-I-uh...." I stuttered.

"Don't try to lie to me again. I know the whole story." He stated. I took a step towards him.

"He is dead. My Dad died 5 years ago. He was murdered by a awful man. I man who may have called himself my father but never was!" I exclaimed my voice beginning to be shaky. He looked at me with a puzzled look.

"Can I see them?" He asked.

Calum's P.O.V

"Can I see them?" I asked her referring to the scars she must of had. She looked at me for a minute.She then and stood up from her bed. She pulled off her Green Day band shirt she was wearing and threw it onto her bed so she was now only in her bra and her high waisted shorts.

My eyes traced ever curve she had. Fuck was she beautiful. She was skinny but still had all the right curves in all the right places. She lifted up her lilac hair and made a bun from the elastic she kept on her wrist.

It was then my eyes caught a small anchor tattoo on the back of her neck. Then I saw everything else.

I walked up behind her and traced the scars she had on her back with my finger. She had 4 on her upper back. One on her left shoulder, another on her right and then two around the middle of her back. I stood there in awe of her scars. Feeling the bumps of scar tissue on them. I harshly gulped and Kylie turned her head to the side.

"Just say it Calum." She said quickly. I spoke the one word that has been jumbling around my mind.

"Why?"I asked my eyes still glued to her scars. She took a deep breath.

"Before I turned 7 things weren't actually that bad. He still lived with us but he was always in and out of jail, he was never around. In that time my mom and I were really close. A little after I turned 7 all this shit started happening. My mom started to really drink, him and her would argue all the time. One day he slapped her. She threatened to call the cops and we all knew how he didn't have the cleanest record so he never did it to her again. Until I was 9 and they got into this huge fight and my mom stormed off and left. He went into my room, locked the door behind him and started to hit me. When he was done he cried and told me that the only reason he was doing this to me was so he couldn't do it to mom and if he couldn't do it to me he would end up doing it to my mom anyways. So I let him if it meant he wouldn't hurt anyone else. As the years went in it progressed and he ended up sexually abusing me and beating me even worse. The scars on my back are all from him throwing me down the stairs. I didn't tell anyone but my sister who already knew but I begged her not to tell anyone. My mom worked late shifts so she never noticed. Eventually I didn't even mind because I grew so numb to the pain." She shakily said and I stayed silent for a moment.

Suddenly my eyes caught something else. I saw another scar not as brutal looking as the other but still a little scar. It was peeking out of her high waisted shorts.

Curiosity took over me. I put my index finger on the waist line of her shorts and slowly tried to pull it down a little so I could see it.

Before I could get a look Kylie quickly turned around and snatched my hand.

"Don't do that." She said sternly and let go of my hand. Damn she has a strong grip. I couldn't help but let my eyes wonder her chest and torso.

So beautiful. I kept repeating in my head.

She turned away and grabbed her shirt off of her bed. She slipped it back over her small frame. She stood there back towards me.

I need to tell her. I don't care if she doesn't feel the same way towards me. She just needs to know how I feel. I need to stop being such a pussy. Do it!

Without thinking I gently grabbed Kylie's arm, spun her around, and smashed my lips onto hers.

She tensed up but quickly eased into it. It felt like pure ecstasy. Our lips moved perfectly together. I moved my hands from her arms to the small of her back to move her closer.

Suddenly she removed my hand from her back and removed her lips from mine. When I opened my eyes she was already staring at me in complete shock, her eyes turning a little red.

She quickly rushed passed me and ran down the stairs and out the door. I stood there confused. Millions of questions running through my mind. I have never felt that way about a kiss before and I know she felt it to. Suddenly I became angry.

I am not letting her get away that easy.