Joy Squad

Pervert's Interview

Joy: So, today we have the most disgusting interview that will ever take place in this squad.

Joy: I give you, the most putrid, obnoxious, perverted, and revolting dragon in the universe,

Joy: *shudders* Macaw.

Macaw: Hey. 

Joy: Just so you know, you are getting violently disemboweled at the end of this interview.

Joy:.....If you last that long.

Macaw: Um....Okay?

Joy: Okay. First question. "Why does no one like you?"

Macaw: What? I don't know what you're talking about- everyone loves me!

Joy:...........My squadron of highly skilled torturers and the entire dragon race be to differ.

Macaw: *shrugs*

Joy: Did you have any luck finding someone else to stalk?

Macaw: Now why would I look for someone else to stalk when I could keep watching you?

Joy:........Macaw, all offense taken and pardon my french, but YOU'RE A CREEPY FUCK.

Macaw:.....Thanks.

Joy: *facetalons*

Joy: Why are you a creepy pervert?

Macaw: Because you wouldn't acknowledge me if I wasn't.

Joy: Fine, I'll rephrase the question. Why are you a fucking pervert?

Macaw: Because I'm ME.

Joy: Why do you like me so much?

Macaw: Because you're the heir to the throne, and not bad to look at. *eyes Joy*

Joy:.........you know what, I think it's time I brought in a friend.

*Kelp appears*

Kelp: *hold knife at Macaw's throat*

Kelp: Your eyes wander anywhere they shouldn't, and your head gets chopped off. Got it?

Macaw: Eep!

Kelp: Hi Joy.

Joy: Good to see you Kelp. Now, next question. Why do you still like me even though I'm with Kelp?

Macaw:........He won't kill me for my answers, right?

Kelp: Depends on the response and if I feel like digging a grave today.

Joy: Moons, I have been a HORRIBLE influence on you. You can help me kill him after the interview, but we have to try to keep him alive for it.

Kelp: *sighs* Fine.

Macaw: I still like you even though you're with Kelp because I know that the dragons of the rainforest would MUCH rather have a Rainwing King then a Seawing, and one day there'll be a coup over it, and you'll ditch him for me because I'll be the only dragon left.

Joy: I'd marry a skunk before I'd even consider you an option. Moving on!

Joy: What do you like about me the most?

Macaw: Looks. You're hot.

Kelp: *growls*

Joy: Did your father tell you directly that you and Joy were meant to be, or did you overhear it?

Macaw: He told me directly- what does this have to do with anything?

Joy: Just answer the questions, that's all we're keeping you alive for.