Drowning In Love And Sorrows - New Chapters!

Never The Answer, Always An Option

JALYN'S POV

It's been two days since I saw Frank's scars. I haven't seen any new ones since then, but that doesn't mean I've stopped being worried about them. I only told Hannah, because I didn't want the band to be hard on him about it.

Kaitlyn asked me to come to her and Hannah's color guard practice for a bit. I walked onto the back lawn of the school. They were all in shorts and t shirts with sunglasses, sweating out half their weight. I spotted Hannah and Kaitlyn. They were towards the middle. I don't know anything about color guard but it sure does look cool. The coach seems to suck though, she's been screaming since I got here. I turned my focus back to the two of them and saw Hannah spinning her flag. She shifted her weight and slammed Kaitlyn in the face with the bottom of her flag. Kaitlyn half giggled half cried until she was just lying on the ground. I couldn't help but giggle.
"Shake it off, weirdo" I yelled over to her. Everyone looked over to me and Kaitlyn lifted her head from the ground.
"Oh hey! I didn't think you'd come" she said a little drowsy sounding.
"Okay Kaitlyn let's get some ice" Hannah said.
"Everyone come back into positions in ten minutes" the coach screamed to the crowd.

Just then I heard footsteps creeping up behind me. I looked up and saw frank standing over me.
"Hey, Frankie, wha-" before I could finish my sentence he grabbed my arm and pulled me over to the bleachers.
"What the hell is wrong with you" I said panning over him.
"Wrong with me? What's wrong with you?! How could you tell Hannah about my cuts, Jalyn??" He looked at me worried and obviously scared.
"I figured she would find out eventually so I thought I'd save her the shock" I said sweetly trying to avoid an argument.
"It wasn't something you were entitled to tell anyone, I didn't even know you knew, God Jalyn why did you tell her" he said getting mad.
"Was trying to help, I'm sorry, I didn't think you'd be upset" I said.
"You can't always fix things Jalyn! Sometimes things just can't be fixed" he said starting to yell. I was getting a little mad about him thinking I was below him or that I didn't need to care about him.
"I'm not trying to fix you, Frankie, I'm just trying to keep you safe. Stop acting like this, there's nothing wrong with you" I said stepping over eggshells.
"JALYN, STOP. I don't want help. I feel like I'm just drifting away from everyone... it's the worst kind of alone. I feel like I'm losing my reasons to be alive, and your making it worse" he yelled and yelled and the only feeling I could find was anger. There were so many better feelings to have in that moment and the only one I had was anger.
"If I can't fix you then who the hell can Frank? Who else has been here for you like me?... huh?... that's disappointing, Frank." I said feeling the heat behind my eyes.
"Okay" Frank looked at me blankly, turned and walked away.

Shit what did I just do, I thought to myself.
"Frank, stop. You know I didn't mean that, I'm sorry... Frankie?" I begged at him. He just kept walking.
"Shit, no no no. Frank, I'm sorry" I started to run to him. I grabbed him by his shoulders. There were tears running from his eyes. I haven't seen him actually cry since the third grade when he jumped from a second story window to land in a pool, and broke his foot. My eyes were wide. His were empty.
"Get off" he said to me, like He'd never seen me before. It hurt, but I let go. My arms fell to my sides, Frank got into his car, and I got in mine.

The whole way home I beat myself up. Who knows what Frank is going to do now.

FRANK'S POV

"Stop crying man, stop crying" I said to myself. I didn't remember crying hurting this much. I don't know what to do. I don't think I have enough reasons to live anymore. I just, don't feel anything.
"Shit, just feel something, Frankie!!" I yelled to myself. I continued to drive home hating myself the whole way. I got to my driveway and just couldn't get out of the car. What's the point tears were still running down my face and I was breathing like I'd run a two minute mile. I backed out of my driveway and just drove. I drove to the old bridge over the river we used to jump off of as kids. If I fall backwards and live, then there's a reason for me to live, if I die it was meant to happen. I told myself as I climbed over the guardrail. I took my jacket off and threw it over the hood of my car.

"I'm sorry" I whispered to myself as I put my arms straight out beside me and leaned backwards. I felt weightless as I fell, there wasn't much time to think about anything but just as my feet left the bridge my phone rang, and I wondered if I'd die thinking who was calling me. My back hit the water and a wave of pain washed over me. I sank, still conscious, I felt my body hit the rocks at the bottom of the river and scrape across each one as they left their permanent mark on me. I was still conscious. Human instinct wanted me to live so without even thinking I started to panic I took in a big gulp of water as if I was breathing air and choked. I struggled to get to the surface of the water for air, it felt miles away. I paddled upwards feeling the weight of my clothes work against me with every stroke. I finally hit the surface, arms flailing helplessly in the air as I drifted to the side of a river only to grab onto a rock that's top was out of the water at low tide. I laid across it facing down and coughed out all the water I'd let into my lungs. The fresh air burned my insides as I took it back in, making me almost wish I'd drown instead. I rolled over and faced the sky for a while before I heard a familiar voice on the shore.

"There you are Frankie, oh my god. Mikey call the police!" It was Kaitlyn. She seemed to be panicking like I was. I wasn't sure how long I'd been laying there I just knew I'd stopped feeling all the pain I felt before. I stayed on the rock for a moment I had no clue what was happening anymore, just that I heard sirens and voices around me. I was being put in an ambulance. I looked over to my right and Hannah was climbing in beside me crying as she held my hand. I felt like I should be crying, but I just wasn't. I squeezed her hand in mine and she let out a sob. I had on an oxygen mask and I was covered in patches to stick IV needles into... like a potato.

We got to the hospital and I was immediately put under anesthesia and taken into an operating room. Am I actually dying? I don't feel anything wrong.

JALYN'S POV

Three broken ribs, a sprained knee, and stitches up and down his back. I could've prevented it all. As I shook in Gerard's arms in a waiting room full of my friends I thought what have you gotten yourself into this time Jalyn?

Hey! Thanks for your patience and support, I appreciate you all and hope you can continue understanding that high school is kicking my butt and I need some extra time to get chapters planned and finished especially for two separate works! Thank you so so much I love you Killjoys🖤🕷