I Am Exhausted From Trying To Be Stronger Than I Feel

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Anne's POV

The priest was speaking but I wasn't listening. All I could do was stare at Gilbert. He looked so heartbroken. Fragile. There wasn't a single tear rolling down his cheek but it was obvious that he was just trying to be brave, so that people wouldn't pity him more.

The funeral was over, when I thought about approaching him.

"Anne..." said Marilla.

"I will stay with Gilbert." I said as I walked away, but not without seeing Marilla's knowing smile.

He was sitting on the bench, taking deep breaths.

"I'm sorry, Gilbert." I said as I put a comforting hand on his shoulder and he leaned into my touch.

"Thank you, Anne." whimpering Gilbert and I realized that he was crying.

"I'm sure he would be proud of you." I said as I gave him a soft smile.

"Mum hasn't spoken since his death. Nothing. Not even a syllable." said Gilbert as I sat down next to him.

"She will eventually."

"Or she will go through what Marilla's mum did." said Gilbert as he started shaking.

"How did you know?" I asked, shocked.

"I accidently read Marilla's journal... I thought it was a book and as I started reading I realized it wasn't. I tried to stop reading it, but I got to intrigued." said Gilbert as he shrugged.

Then, Charlie approached.

"He would be proud of who've became." said Charlie as he put a comforting hand on his back.

"GILBERT." shouted somebody and Gilbert turned and walked towards the person.

Ruby?

"Is everything alright?" asked Gilbert, concerned.

He and Ruby were like siblings. They were always by each other's side. Ruby actually accidentally called him, her brother.

"I found out how he died."

"How?" asked Gilbert, scared of her answer as me and Charlie approached them.

"This medicine." said Ruby as she showed him the medicine.

"I chose that. It was to save him, not kill him." said Gilbert as he started to get worried.

"I brought him this one about a month ago from Avonlea. There's the date. Yet, it's still full." said Ruby as she handed him the medicine.

"He wasn't supposed to stop drinking his medicine." said Gilbert, thoughtfully.

"Or else he would die... I know my aunt drinks it." said Ruby, as she gave Gilbert a pitiful look.

Gilbert suddenly looked up and he was red in fury.

"HE STOPPED DRINKING IT ON PURPOSE." yelled Gilbert as he started pulling on his hair.

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