Your Beggar Fangurl (Ang Pulube Mong Fan)

The World that I Can't Change

CHAPTER 6

Bumalik kami ni Yeol sa tinutuluyan namin na parehong sabog, ni hindi ko na nga maalala yung pinag-uusapan namin na tawa kami ng tawa hanggang sa sabay kaming bumagsak sa kama. Nakakapagtaka nga eh, hindi ko na rin maalala kung paano namin na manage na makauwi ng ligtas.

Gumagalaw na ang ceiling sa paningin ko at ramdam ko na ang bigat ng dalawang talukap ng mga mata ko, pero pinigilan ko muna ang antok para lang humarap kay Yeol at pagmasdan siya ng ilang minuto.

Naabutan ko na siyang nakapikit, at kahit gaano kasakit lahat ng ibinigay niyang impormasyon sa akin, iba pa rin yung hinahatid niyang saya sa puso ko sa mga simpleng pagkakataon na tulad nito. At dahil na rin siguro sa karupukan ko't kalasingan, di napigilan ng palad ko na hawakan ang pisngi niya. Ramdam ko ang bahagyang init neto sa kabila ng lamig sa labas.

Lord, ba't kasi gumawa ka pa ng ganitong nilalang?

Maya-maya unti-unting nagbukas ang mga mata niya at nagkatitigan kaming dalawa na para bang binabasa namin ang isip ng isa't-isa.

Yeol, mahal na mahal na ata talaga kita. Parang totoo na, pwede bang sabihin mo sakin kung ano ng gagawin ko? Kahit na lasing ako, napigilan ko pa rin ang sarili ko na wag sambitin ang mga salitang yan na nakalutang sa utak ko para sakanya, pero para bang narinig niya ang munting tinig ng puso ko, ng marahan siyang lumapit at inilapat niya ang malambot niyang mga labi sa labi ko.

Nakakatuwa rin na parang alam na alam ko ang gagawin niya kaya awtomatik na sumagot ako sa halik niya.

It was soft and gentle at first, until he pin me down below him. His kisses became rough as our bodies also started following the motions of our lips.

I can taste and smell the strong liquor on his mouth, but I no longer care as long as it's filling me. We kissed more and move with our hands touching and caressing each others skin everywhere.

It was a long passionate kiss, until both of us were out of breath and we have no other choice but to break it. He looked at me for a seconds, before he started giving me small kisses again to my cheek, down to the edge of my jaw.

We were still so close that I can literally hear and feel the air he breathes in and out. Then he reached my earlobe, he was trying to lick it giving me chills and tickles, before he suddenly uttered a name which I never heard, "Li..."

I froze.

The pain of his word woke my drunk senses as a fang of invisible knife stab me deep in my chest.

"Yeol." I called him, with his ear just next to my face.

He was about to give kisses on my neck, but then he stopped especially when I finally said, "It's me Yeran... I am not Li."

We looked into each others eyes until his looks turned into flustered.

"Oh ghad! I'm sorry!" He said before hugging me again, burying his face over my neck.

"I'm sorry Ye!" He repeated, until I felt him cry.

"I'm really sorry Yeran, I just... I just really missed her."

That broke me into pieces, til the next thing I only knew was it's game over. I felt total numbness from head to toe.

Also both of us were in tears, the only difference was he was crying loud and clear, while I'm biting my tongue trying hard to control myself to not let my pain be heard.

And though my hands were shaking and I was currently loosing it, I still hugged him in return while caressing his hair to comfort him as he cried even more over my shoulder.

Fck.

Now I know how it really feels to die inside.

*********

Kinabukasan parehas kaming may hang-over, pero kahit sobrang sakit din ng ulo ko, pinilit ko pa ring bumangon at magluto ng sabaw na panghimagas.

Asa kusina ako, tapat ng stove at kawali na may simpleng beef stew na kanina ko pa hinahalo-halo, ng maramdaman ko si Yeol na yakapin ako mula sa likod.

Grabe sobrang nangilabot ang buo kong katawan sa ginawa niya! I mean hindi ko ba alam kung bakit hindi ko siya namalayan sa likod ko!

"Good morning." He said with a crack voice.

"Good morning." I answered back in return.

"Malapit na tong uminit."

"Mmmhmmm."

Sabi niya habang nakayakap pa rin from behind, his chin was on my neck, and I know our faces were just inches away.

"Salamat Ye."

"Tsk."

"Ikaw na talaga ang pinakapaborito kong tao sa mundo."

"Pwes, pautangin mo na ang pinakapaborito mong tao sa mundo."

I heard him chuckle, and just like that we started our day happily without Yeol throwing fist with life again.

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