The Royal Alpha, & Loyal Luna

35. I Am Uncannily Like Minette .

I had killed someone.

And what left an even more dizzying ache was how tightly closed my chest and head felt to it all. The icy breeze that mentally had my brain frost bitten. The raw numbness that was far more painful than if I had been allowed to feel it. To feel what I had done.

"Nova." His stern, yet uncertain voice captured my attention though I didn't taken my eyes off of the beating heart.

A small, minuscule sliver of me was screaming inside. To drop it, run, hide where no one can find me. A killer. A monster. A murderer. I, Nova Royale Du Val, had.. I had killed someone.

Yet here I was, with a smile that would give the devil a run for his money and the Goddess more than a fright. A firm hold on the heart. And a curious, sickening want for more, just.. more.

And then I caught a whiff of it.

Snapping my head in its direction, my blazing eyes landed on the source of the smell. A sparkling lilac colored liquid had dried across his face in a downward smear. It was where I'd touched him.

"Gabriel?"

He walked cautiously towards me with his hands up, briefly glancing downward at the lifeless body, to Gio, then back up at me.

"Yes, Gabe. Your friend." He nodded as if to reassure me.

"My friend?" I searched my depths, hoping to feel within me what he'd said I'd had. But the deeper I went, the more empty I felt. "I have no friends.. just flanks." My voice wasn't harsh, but it wasn't welcoming either.

"You know I don't believe that. And I know you don't believe that either." He stopped moving when my eyes flickered down to his feet and back up. "You know I'm you're friend. And if not that, you know I am a friend of Tino's."

"Tino?" It'd already felt like long, hard years had passed since I'd freed him. Would it truly be that long before someone freed me?

"Yes, your little brother. Someone who needs you. Your pack. And Grey.." With how wide and keen my eyes were, I noticed the smallest twitch under his eyes.

"You." I turned away from Bowman's body. "You need me."

His eyes never roamed, but I knew they were watching more than just my eyes. If he could, a part of me knew that Gabe would attempt to see my soul and far beyond. But by way of the Goddess, it was not his to see.

"Yes, Nova." He dropped to his knee, bowing his head before me. Though he wasn't a wolf, it was the wolf's way of respect. Of honoring. "I need you. We all do."

Footsteps, quick yet stealthy, diverted my attention. Gio had approached me, dropping his thin sweatshirt over my head. I carefully slid it on, it coming just above my knees. When I turned back, Gabe was standing, watching me with intent eyes. It was only then I realized why he was watching me with such a hard gaze.

I was still holding Bowman's heart in my hand.

"We should get you back." He looked as if he wanted to approach me, but didn't. Even Gio kept his distance, not making any contact with me as he handed off his clothing.

Are they afraid of me?

I looked down at the pumping organ in my grasp.

They should be.

"Augustine is back at the motel. We should make sure he's still alive, looked like the old man was barely breathing."

I stared at the heart a moment longer.

"Luna?" Gio questioned.

But I couldn't say anything. For I feared the lump in my throat wouldn't be a release of sobs if I spoke, it would be the promise words that there would be more death. I was sure of it.

I turned with silent feet, even in the snow, and wandered back to the motel room in a half daze of bloodlust and pure terror. Was it terror? Terror of the unknown, of myself, what I would do next, who would be next..

I was becoming Minette, a monster, a disease on the heart. And the longer I held one in my hand, the heavier the feeling of dread became. The burden that would forever weigh on my shoulders. I had taken a life. A wolf's life. One of my kind no matter how many times I may and will forever be told otherwise. That I am nothing like them.

But the truth was.. is, that I am uncannily like Minette. A sly, manipulative liar who hides behind false hopes and broken promises. A catastrophe wreaking unending, soul-tearing pain through everyone and everything that I love.

At this point, it was no longer the matter of if Minette was a monster and I was not.. it was now down to who would be the bigger, badder one. And that she-wolf, by the heart in my hand, was going to be me.

"We're here." When my eyes fell to Gabe's, his lips flattened into a thin line as if regretting saying anything. Even something so small.

"May I suggest a shower in the main room?" Gio's unusual kindness minus the roughness around his usual jagged edges was more eery than even me in this moment. "I'll have some food delivered and Augustine put together."

Augustine?

That's right.. Augustine.

I slowly drug my feet inside the dimly lit motel room from the back entrance and instead of making my way to the main room's bathroom, I headed straight for the smell of wulphed. Wulphed that had not been there before, or maybe was.. just not as prominent.

I stood with my face parallel to the guest bathroom door, knowing that on the other side, another wolf was falling victim to Minette's sickness. Could I face him after what I'd done? There once was a wolf devoted to her, craving her love as many others, and even knowing the drug of her love was in his system.. I'd still taken him down. Would I do the same to him?

I turned to look at the two pair of eyes watching me carefully. 'Alone.' I sent to Gio.

He nodded once, turning to Gabe. "We'll need to find a Traveler my friend to get you linked." He gestured for them to leave. "Time to go, we'll be on standby." I knew he'd said the last part aloud more so for me than for Gabe.

"A Traveler?" Gabe carried on down the hall. "What the hell is that?"

"A Witch, longtooth. Don't tell me you've never crossed paths with one.." I could still hear their small conversation as they made their way to the living room.

I turned the knob, pushing the door open slowly.

Hazel eyes found my blue ones. "You again."

All I could do was stare at the battered man as he lay sprawled inside the tub. Bruises colored his skin in many shades and open wounds still bled fresh blood. Its metallic smell was heavy in the air.

I walked in, closing the door behind me though never taking my eyes off of him. He went from watching me with relieved, familiar eyes to unknowing and apprehensive.

"You were right about still having it in your system." His eyes found an emotion for me I hadn't seen in a while. True pity. I had only ever known it after I 'buried' Minette. Left after right people had felt sorry for me. It had always been a waste of an emotion to me. "And.. I was wrong about you being.. you."

I smiled softly, too soft for even him to notice. Taking a seat on top of the lidded back tub of the toilet, I placed a white towel on my thighs and set my trophy down in my lap atop of it.

"What's that you have there?" He tilted his head for a better angle, but dared not to move his weak body. "Ah," Realization slowly dawned on him. "The Bounty is no more."

Silence washed over the small room.

"The old dog had what was coming to him." He said softly.

I looked to him with fierce eyes, an array of emotions dancing around my heart at the statement. And then the comprehension of what that, in turn, questioned.

"Do I.." Eyes that looked all too much like my father's bore into mine. "Have what's coming to me too?"