ISAAC's OC REVIEWs

Wesley Minae [E]

Please note that I ask a lot of questions throughout the review, you by no means have to answer them, they are simply to get you thinking more in-depth about your character. Enjoy!

fandom: harry potter, set in 2055

[That's new.]

full name: wesley minae

[Seems to fit the universe.]

age: 11-17, naturally

gender: male

sexuality: hetero

species: human

patronus: polecat

[Creepy little buggers, ain't they? They eat spiders so I'll be civil with 'em I suppose.]

blood status: adopted, unknown

[No documentation of his birth parents? With the lack of a backstory, it makes things 10 times harder. How did he get into the Minae Family? Fingers crossed he wasn't dropped off at the front door. Why was he given up? No note? Are his birth parents alive? Why can't we know his blood status, you ain't gonna jump us and tell us he's half owl blood, right?]

nationality: canadian (originally from winnipeg, moved to london)

[I can't decide if that's a reference to AVPM if so.... well placed my friend, well placed. When and why did they move to London?]

magical school: hogwarts. if he had not made such good friends in london, he wouldve moved back to canada to go to ilvermorny as soon as he got the chance

[Where does he stay in the holidays? Does he go back to the Minae household in London or does he ask to stay at Hogwarts? What other friends did he make in London, all he's got in his relations is his family and Syndey, I'd add these other friends to his relations and write about how they met and how they get on.]

house: hufflepuff (huge surprise there)

['What the hell is a Hufflepuff?']

"animagus": turns into a screech owl at will, though not technically an animagus, but instead a powerful curse.

[If it's not an Animagus I won't put it under an Animagus section, perhaps consider adding a 'Magical abilities' section and moving this under that one. Moving on, cursed by who, when and why?]

year: 2-7; 2056-2066 (he was unable to attend school in first year, but lazy headmaster at the time otto fires had him complete an entrance exam to see if he qualified for second year curriculum)

[What did Wesley do for year 7 {or first year}? Did he go to a Muggle secondary school? Did Wesley even know he was a wizard before getting the Hogwarts letter? Was it difficult for him to leave all the modern day technology that his home/Muggle school had? How'd he pass the entry exam? Did he have any prior knowledge to pass the entry exam? I'm assuming to start second year the student must be able to do basic first-year spells, and I'm unsure if Wesley had that ability at 12.]

appearance: like most male children, joan [Wesley?] was "short" during his early years (4'7 at the shortest) and then grew later in his teens, around 5'9.

[If most male children were short, wouldn't that the short height the average height? At least in his class.

Either way, I don't think you need to state that 'he was this at this age and grew to this' it just seems like empty sentences. Consider removing the 4"7' section and introducing him as 5"9', maybe just stick to one age rather than have '11 – 17'. Having Wesley be 17 makes the most logical sense for this version of his profile, there ain't nothing stopping you from making him a profile where he is 11 and 4"7']