Iron Dad Oneshots (Under Editing)

A Broken Mind For The Once Happy

Set between Civil War and Homecoming <3

TW: Thoughts of depression; attempted suicide

There wasn't a day that went by that wasn't accompanied by tears, Peter realized. Not since what the public has deemed 'Civil War'. He remembers knowing even then, that they wouldn't call. He knew, yet it still hurts as the days go by and yet, he's not needed. Useless, forgotten, annoying. Did he come off as too pushy? God, all he wanted to do was help, but he can't even do that right, can he. For once in his life he wishes... He wishes someone wanted him enough to actually do the things they promised. Now, it feels like even May doesn't have a use for him, and that, that hurts. Most days he just wishes it would all be over, that he wouldn't have to live in this god awful world anymore. But every morning he finds himself in his bed, back against the wall. Every night after dinner, if any, would find him in the corner, crying. All he wants to do is help, but maybe it's better if he didn't. 

Ned doesn't come around anymore. There was no reason for it, just one day he up and left, and now Peter was left with the mess of his heart to clean up. It's been, rough, to say the least. Yet, somehow, nobody has noticed this, this episode, if you will. Maybe they just think he deserves to go through it, because he sure thinks he does.

Now he stands on the top of his building, the night of New York biting at him. If he looked hard enough, he could see the slight glimmer of a star beyond the polluted fog of the city. Without realizing, the tears began to fall. He took a step closer to the edge, hitting call on the phone in his hand. May was at work and wouldn't be able to pick up. He'd leave a teary message of how he loves her and how it wasn't her fault. Just as planned, he got voicemail.

"Hey, May," he choked down a sob as he said her name for the last time. "I love you so much, and," he let out a loud sob. "What I'm about to do, has nothing to do with you, you were perfect. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he sobbed as he ended the call. Another step. 

He scrolled through his contacts before hitting call once more. As he predicted, voicemail.

"Hey, Happy. I know I haven't done this in a while, but uh, the last one you'll get from me, so there's a plus, right?" he paused, waiting for an answer before he remembered he was on voicemail. With a watery, biting laugh. "Just, uh, I guess it was nice having someone to report to for once, even if you didn't care much, thanks," he ended the call. He set his phone on the ledge, then his shoes, which were in his hand. He wiped his face with his sleeve and took another step. and another, and then, he was gone, falling through the air, eyes closed tight in anticipation. He slammed into the surface, but why didn't he die? Why can't he be normal in that? Why? He screamed out in agony. Not from pain on the outside, but the pain in his soul, his suffering. He was tied down, he realized as he went to go get up to find a larger building, or something, anything.

"Sh, calm down buddy, it's okay," he wasn't tied down, he realized, he was being held, by big, metal arms. There was a loud ringing. "It's okay, It's all going to be okay, Pete, shh," was that Mr. Stark? Why was he here, he didn't care about Peter. Peter said nothing, just cried louder. Why? Why couldn't they just let him go? Why?

Please be safe you guys. I love all of you so much. Remember to talk to people. Don't feel afraid to message me <3