One step at a time

2

Melissa Newman

It was morning, the sun beaming through the gap in the curtains while Bradly had a stronghold on me scared that I was just a dream, a distant memory one he desperately wanted back. I would show him that I was not going anywhere but right now I needed to take my pills and eat something. There were countless nights he would sleep in here his scent is strong in here and I was fine with that. I unwrapped myself from him grabbing my medicine bag and carried myself down the stairs. "He's been sleeping in my room right?" I asked as I entered the kitchen area. "Ever since you left he wanted to keep it warm for when you returned he had hope that you would he felt like you had forgotten about him" My mother whispered the last part but I had heard it as she placed pancakes in front of me.

"I had the most devastating dream last night I thought it was real" Bradly's sad voice echoed through the walls until he had reached the kitchen. "I-It was real your here I thought my brain was playing a trick on me" I chuckled slightly. "You will never get rid of me Lee no matter how hard you try" A smile reached his lips as he kissed my cheek. "He's being affectionate" I whispered to my dad. "Only with you if I was a stranger watching you two I would think you were a couple" dad laughed like it was the funniest thing in the world. "He missed you Melissa he's trying to shower you with love so you never leave him again" I somewhat knew her statement was true. "If he knew why I left and my reasoning he would throw me away faster than the flash" I had been watching a lot of the flash lately being cooped up in a hospital for two years would do that to you. "He would not he'd understand just tell him that way there are no secrets between the two of you and you'd be happier plus he wouldn't question why you can't participate in certain activity's. "Your right, school starts tomorrow I need to tell him today but I don't know how" A single tear left me, I knew telling him would break him. I just didn't know to what extent.

"Are you ready for t-the what's wrong?" Smiling I replied with the only thing I could think of right now. "I'm just happy to be home" He grabbed my hand squeezed it the pulled me towards the front door. I could do this but I wanted our fun day first before I lost him forever. Pulling into the mall the smile wouldn't drop off my face this was the happiest day of my life and it would always be the happiest day of my life this would be the last memory I took to the grave, this would be the memory I cherish, this would be the memory I would live for. At the back of the mall was the yearly carnival one that Lee and myself would always go together just ourselves this was twin time we always had one day a month where we would drop everything and have twin time because at the end of the day that's what we needed, we would always need and depend on each other.

Ride after ride no matter how weak and tired I was I kept going I was going to give Lee this, I wanted him to see me as the happy, cheerful girl again even though its something I'm not. The day was coming to an end well not an end the carnival shut at 2 pm for a couple of hours otherwise we would be there all night. "Are you hungry we could get some frozen Yo then find something to eat" I was happy about how much he cared for me even though it was all going to be ripped away, he would think I was selfish, and in a way I was but I was also looking after the ones who I cared about most. I didn't want them to think of me differently it needed to be this way and I just hope he would understand.

"This has been fun Lee" smiling I grabbed his hand and shoved him towards our seat, the seat we would always sit at whenever we were here. I already knew what I was ordering I had done it so many times before. We always ordered our favourites then gave them to the other person but half the time we ended up eating our own it was our ritual. The twin ritual. I was back and I was alive. "so what's been happening since I had been gone" Lifting the spoon and shoved it in my mouth. "You haven't asked about him yet why?" I knew who he was talking about but I couldn't face him, I had hoped that he was living life and happy I didn't want to ruin it. "Please don't I just I don't want to know yet" I half-smiled. "He was your best friend you abandoned him too" Is that really what Bradly thought? He thought I had abandoned him. "I was closer than you thought, I had my reasons and you will too soon but not now I want to enjoy our day first" I smiled at the end. I knew the truth was coming I knew I had no way of hiding it from him he was too close he lived where I lived he was half of me and soon he would understand I couldn't keep hiding my pills from him I hadn't taken them today because well I left them on the bench when we left it wasn't anyone's fault.