Trapped Freedom

chapter 10

Yoona
The next day after our beach day, we decided to go for a spa day. Of course, my friends invited Mr. Ji to join us because they were so kind. Like at the beach he met us there and we went forward. The girls and guys went to their respected dressing rooms before meeting back up on the other side dressed to get into the saunas. Everyone went their separate ways and this includes me. I bounced around to different rooms feeling the differences until I came into the salt room. The room's temperature seemed perfect and I laid down. I felt myself dozing off but my sleep was interrupted when I heard someone take a seat next to me with a heavy sigh. "Yoona?" I heard whisper to check if I was asleep or not. I honestly didn't want to be bothered so I pretended like I was. I could hear him breathing a bit sadly. "Are you sleep?" I stayed silent. "It's so frustrating. " I raised my eyebrows confused about what he was talking about. "Its because I know I shouldn't be like this but I still am. I don't know what I'm gonna do." I was curious so I turned around to be facing whoever was talking to me. I kept my eyes closed so they can just think I'm still sleeping. "It would be so easy to push the blame but I don't think I can say this anyone else fault. Now the only question is don't act upon my desires." I opened one eye to see Mr. Ji sitting next to me with his legs crossed and his back against the wall. Thankfully he wasn't looking directly at me at the moment so I closed my eye again before he saw I was awake. "Can I ask you a question? Did you mean what you said?" I wanted to ask what he was talking about but knowing him I may not get the answer to that. "When you saw me after you woke up, did you really mean it when you said I was the love of your life?" I stopped breathing for a year second before I kept listening. "Do you really not remember what happened the night you went into your coma. It's all my fault." Why would he say that? Is what I was asking myself but I didn't have to wait long for an answer. "I was so stressed that night. I didn't have the control over myself or the fate in your plan. I should have trusted you given that you have always delivered top-notch work. I don't even remember what was making so frustrated other than work and Minyoung. We had been fighting for days and neither of us would give up. That same week, I noticed a drop in profits so I assigned you a plan to bring the backup. Stressed over it all, when I would see you calm and understanding I would feel better. It wasn't until you finally completed you plan Minyoung and I had the biggest fight we have ever had that almost led to us breaking up. That day you told me your plan and I knew it was gonna work eventually but I was so frustrated that it wasn't gonna work right away I let all my anger and frustration out on you. I regret what I did and I knew I hurt you but you didn't show any fear, you didn't complain, and you were calm when you just said okay and left. I was calling you nonstop and wanted to apologize but you ignored all the calls. The next day I got the notice form Seohyun that you were in an accident." I let out a silent deep breath and I felt myself shack a little because as he explained this I could see bits and pieces in my mind. Only where I was but I could see it. "That's when they started, It went on and on every night until you woke up. At least that certain one." I was a bit confused about what he was talking about anymore. Despite all that I realized how important it is to not hold a grudge when I heard about you. I went to talk to Minyoung and we made that night. But now here we are." I suddenly felt his hand gently brush my hair. As I felt him do it again I heard the door to the room open and he rushed to move his hand. "There you are, come on we are about to get something to eat." I was Minho who had been looking for the both of us. "um, Yoona is sleeping." "Really? Noona, wake up." Minho walked over and shook my shoulder gently. I stayed down and let him do it again before I pretended to wake up. "hm?" I sounded like I just got up from a deep sleep. "noona, let's go eat." I nodded my head slowly and got to my feet and stretched before I turned around and pretended I didn't see him there. "hi." I bowed to him before I walked out. 

Changwook's Pov

I had found Yoona and told her my problem while she was sleeping. I was thankful because I didn't want to cause any more trouble. I never understood what was the problem of following your head vs your heart but with this, I understand the struggle. In my head I am told over and over again, you have a commitment to Minyoung. I normally do what my head tells me but for the first time ever My desires have made itself equal with my ability to chose right and wrong. My desire tells me, pursue Yoona, she already loves you so what are you waiting for? It feels like every time I think I'm gonna do something, something happened that stops me. When I am thinking I want to be with Yoona more than her boss or her friend, my mind reminds me I am with Minyoung. Whenever Minyoung tires to tempt me into things as interment as sex or even just kissing I think about Yoona. I think about how I wish she were the one I was with instead of Minyoung. receiving her kisses or going to bed to with her. Having a family after we get married. I think of all but when I come to I am still with Minyoung. ever since my dream of the whole being a king thing happened, I knew I didn't love Minyoung the way I thought I did before but when I think about it more I wonder why I never noticed Yoona before. The answer to that question is I did. I always noticed her because how could you not but I just never took my chance. I work with her for years and always silently admired her. She wasn't just beautiful, she was intelligent, she was a passionate, funny, had a warm personality and I could go on and on. I know all this and love all of it but why did I never try? Simply because I was with Minyoung and that sounds stupid but at the same time I thought that nothing was wrong. I feel something for Minyoung but not what she wants me to feel for her. Why did I stay with her for all these years? We got together a while ago before I met Yoona and got together. We don't fight often, we don't require a lot and that was something I was happy I didn't have to worry about. at least I used to not have to worry about that. Now Minyoung expects me to put everything aside all the time to pay attention to her and her wants and needs. I know I should give her attention and I try my best but there are some things that are more important at times.