The Wolf and The Lion || Jaime Lannister

Twenty Eight

Rayna

It's a few days ride to the Twins for Walder Frey's wedding. In that time I've become acquainted with Talisa.
"So originally it was Robb who was meant to marry Walders daughter or was it his granddaughter?" I ask Talisa.
"Yes, Robb agreed to marry his daughter for as he put it, a very important bridge", she laughs
"I'm glad that Walder settled for our uncle marrying his daughter but Robb broke his oath, it seems off to me", I say confessing my ill feelings about this wedding.
"I suppose Walder just wants to marry his daughters and granddaughters off and a Tully will do", she says not concerned at all. Robb and mother aren't but they've been in the North that long they've forgotten that not everyone has a code of honour.
"I'm not sure about that", I question.
"Well whatever his personal feelings are the wedding will be over with in a mere few days and soon I'll have Robbs baby", she smiles touching her already large stomach.
"I never thought my little brother would be married before me", I say somewhat sadly
"You and Robb are about the same age though aren't you?"
"Robb is almost a year younger, my mother said he was conceived the night before my Father went south with Robert Baratheon, which was maybe two months after I was born. then my father came back with a bastard son and a new son already waiting for him" The fact my father was unloyal to my mother has never sat right with me. It just never seemed right.
"Your mother hates Jon, but Robb loves him, what was that like?" She asks curiously. She wants to know more about Robbs upbringing and his life, I can see in her eyes that she's in love with him.
"Robb and Jon and I were very close growing up, I was the eldest but they felt like my big brothers, looking at him now he certainly does, sometimes Robb and I would even say we were twins. All of us children loved Jon, well Sansa was a bit like my mother when it came to him but in the end we all loved each other very much and gods what I would do to see Jon"
Out of all my siblings it was always Jon and Robb I missed the most. Robb and I's relationship is still somewhat tense but it's slowly going back to how it was. Jon however I miss awfully.
"I wish I could have met them all", Talisa says taking my hand comfortingly.
"I wish you could have as well. I'll admit when I heard Robb broke his oath and married a foreign woman I wasn't sure how I felt", I confess to her and she simply nods "I mean who am I to talk I ran away from my own wedding. I love Jaime and Robb loves you, my poor mother is still beside herself because of us", I laugh and she shares my smile "I am very glad he did marry you, and I'm glad I've met you, I know we are going to be good friends"
"So do I", she smiles, she is alone here as well, in a foreign place for the man she loves. Just as I was "Where is Jaime anyways?"
"Sleeping, he hasn't been the same since he lost his hand, it's been weeks but he will never be the same", I tell her. However ever since he lost his hand I've seen him change and not for the worst. He may be broken but as he's slowly starting to heal his heart is showing. The goodness in it I always saw is coming to the surface.
"I've heard many stories about him, Kingslayer, Oathbreaker, man without honour, quite a few words from Robb and your mother", she says and I'm unsurprised, then she lowers her voice "I heard what he did to your brother, that he was sleeping with his own sister and that the King is his son"
Jaime and I may just be the biggest scandals in Westeros.
"It is true", I admit "So you can see why Robb and mother despise him"
"But when he's with you all I see is a broken man, clinging to the one thing he has left", she says softly and I feel a little stab in the heart. It's too true.
"He has done awful things, things I can't make sense of like fucking Cersei but I know why he did what he did to Bran. He did it out of love for his family, it has taken me a long time to forgive him, not fully but I've put that betrayal behind us. He has proven himself to me and I would do anything for him, I love him"
"Anyone can see how much you love him", she smiles "and especially how much he loves you".
I wish mother and Robb were as understanding and kind as she is.

Catelyn

We are camped for the night and as I'm walking to my tent I overhear Jaime and Rayna talking in theirs. My curiosity gets the better of me and I stop to listen.
"I've fucked up so many times and I want to do this one thing right", Jaime says exasperatedly.
"I have faith in you", Rayna assures him.
"You are the best thing that could have ever happened to me", he says and the sheer raw emotion in his voice surprises me "I don't want to lose you", he says
"You won't, we managed to overcome everything in our path and we will continue to do that, you won't lose me again"
"I'll be going away for a long time, months probably", he warns her
"I will be here waiting for you", she promises much to my distain.
"I don't want to leave you again"
He truly does love her. As much as he loves her I just can't approve of him. He crippled my baby boy.
"Jaime, if you do this then we will be married"
"Last time I left you I thought I'd be gone for a few weeks and then I was gone for over a year. It will be a very long time, especially if you return to Winterfell and I'll likely be with a fugitive with Sansa"
"Only if you can't organise a deal"
"She's married to Tyrion, she's a Lannister"
The very words strike fury in my core. Even if they save Sansa from that marriage Rayna will become a Lannister.
"At least it's not Joffrey"
"At least it's not Joffrey indeed", he agrees and I can sense the distain he has for his bastard son "I will do everything I can, I promise but just know I might not come back for a long time"
"I know, and I'll wait for you", she promises again.
"I can't go anywhere here without being afraid someone's going to murder me, I can't exactly defend myself", he confesses to her. If he can't defend himself how can he defend my daughters.
"You have Robbs protection", she tells him and I have to stop myself from scoffing. Robb would happily kill him given the chance. The only reason he isn't dead yet is because of Rayna. He doesn't have Robb's protection, he has Rayna's.
"Dinner was awful the other night with him" , he mutters.
It truly was awful. I just wanted to tell Robb to put his head on a spike and send it back to his sister for what he did to my little boy. Rayna has pleaded with me to see his reasoning for it but why she would love a man who has been fucking his sister since they were children is beyond me. But for her sake and knowing that Jaime will be my son by law if he survives bringing Sansa back I need to find it in my heart to be civil. My hatred distanced me from my family once, my hatred for Jon. I'm not going to let my emotions strain my relationship with my children again. Gods Rayna and I fought over Jon and I know she will fight just as fiercely if not more over Jaime. She was hot headed as a child but since returning from Kings Landing she is something different. She has a way with words and a wrath that's barely being contained. When I saw her speech to the Lords I finally understood what Jaime had said about her not being the girl I thought she was.
"It was better than I thought it would be" Rayna says to him.
"I hate it Ray, I can't even cut my own fucking food how am I meant to be a knight. Even if I leave the kings guard and take my place as heir, I am a soldier, that's what I will always be no matter what titles I'm given"
"You are a soldier, yes you will never be as good as before and that's the harsh truth, but you are a commander. You lead men in battle and you will be a Lord someday"
"The last army I commanded I lost to your brother and I don't know the first thing about being a Lord"
"I can help you", she says and I've always known that she was better suited to be the Lord of Winterfell than any of her brothers. She always listened to her Father and took an interest while her brothers didn't. If she does marry Jaime she will become the lady of Casterly Rock and I'm sure that she will be the one running it not Jaime. Hopefully that will satisfy her. However I'm also aware that if anything were to happen to Robb then she would be his heir. After that speech and seeing her with the Lords I wish that she was the one who they crowned.
"You have lost your hand but you will learn as I've said so many times, you will learn to fight. You already know how to command an army and I know that you will be a good Lord"
"Now you are just trying to talk me up", he says bashfully.
"In my eyes you've only become a better man"
It is true that since he lost his hand he is no longer the same cocky bastard he always was. He has humbled slightly but I wouldn't say he was a good man to start with.
"I'm surprised you want to marry a cripple, you are young she shouldn't have to cut an old mans food", he says and he is very right there. She is too young to marry a man who is nearly forty and has one hand. Too young to spend her life caring for him. He still has his youth and he certainly acts like a reckless young man but give it twenty years or soand he will be a grey old man or dead from age if he managed to live that long and she will be my age and a widow. Just like I am.
"My mother once told me, throngs of passion only last so long, that's what they all assumed we were. My family did, Cersei did, even Tyrion who was our only supporter did but they were wrong", she says "You and me have been building something unbreakable since we met".
I wanted to believe it was just the passion and lust of a young girl and the manipulations of an older man but it's not. He took care of her when I couldn't, when Ned couldn't. Their affair in Kings Landing lasted for months and somehow after all this time they love each other more strongly than ever. It isn't a throng of passion, it's real love.
"I know sweetheart", he says and he is silent for a long while before saying "I am sorry for doing this to your family"
"You've never apologised directly for it without trying to justify it", she says and perhaps she isn't as much of a blind lovesick fool as I thought. I thought that she forgave him but perhaps she hasn't. Not fully anyways.
"You hated me for it and I was terrified you would always hate me"
"I did hate you for what you did and you know that it's something I'll never be able to fully forgive", she stammers and I realise she has more honour than I thought. That he hasn't corrupted our daughter "But you are not the same man you were when you were with Cersei and when you pushed him"
"I'm not that man anymore", he agrees "You know why I did it, to protect my children but I didn't want him to be crippled, I wanted it to be clean and over in a second. I'm sorry for the conflict and pain I've created"
My anger fades away and I know that his voice is the sound of a man who is truly sorry. Part of me will always hate him for what he has done but for Raynas sake I need to accept their relationship. Perhaps it's true that he is no longer that man.
"Thank you" she says sounding emotional "You should go to bed, you're basically a walking corpse"
"I hope I look better than a corpse", he replies
She laughs as she says "Always"
"I know I look awful but surely I can compete with a corpse"
I step away from the tent and as I walk away I smile slightly. They are truly in love. As much as I despise him I am glad my daughter has found true love with a man from a noble house even if it would be the last man I would choose. He would do anything for her and in the future he will be Lord of Casterly Rock and she will be the Lady of it. He can give her a good life if we survive this war. But if anything were to happen to Robb she would become the Queen in the North and I don't think that is a fate she's realised yet.