Time Book I

The End of the World

CHAPTER 8| JIGGERY POCKERY

   "We have the attendance (Y/N), the Doctor, and Rose Tyler. Thank you. All staff to their positions," the blue man speaks into a microphone. A lot of small people appear and begin working. "Hurry, now, thank you. Quick as we can. Come along, come along. And now, might I introduce the next honored guest? Representing the Forest of Cheam, we have trees, namely, Jabe, Lute and Coffa. There will be an exchange of gifts representing peace. If you could keep the room circulating-" 

   The tree people come up to the Doctor and (Y/N) who are quietly speaking to each other. "The Gift of Peace. I bring you a cutting of my Grandfather," the women tree known as Jabe says. She hands them a rooted twig in a small pot.

   "Thank you. Yes, gifts. Er, I give you in return air from my lungs," the Doctor says breather on her gently.

   "How intimate," Jabe says smiling. (Y/N) is slightly disgusted but doesn't say anything.

   "There's more where that came from."

   "I bet there is," (Y/N) says sarcastically. More people hand them gifts when the steward speaks over the intercom again.

   "And last but not least, our very special guest. Ladies and gentlemen, and trees, and multiform, consider the Earth below. In memory of this dying world, we call forth the last human. The Lady Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen." 

   A face in a piece of thin skin stretched in a rectangular frame is wheeled in by two men hidden in top-to-toe hospital whites. "Oh, now, don't stare. I know, I know it's shocking, isn't it? I've had my chin completely taken away and look at the difference. Look how thin I am. Thin and dainty. I don't look a day over two thousand. Moisturize me, moisturize me," Cassandra says.

   Awhile latter, Rose is playing with the ball they got from the meme people. "Earth Death in twenty five minutes," the computer says over the intercom.

   "Oh, thanks." Rose puts the ball down and picks up the plant pot. "Hello, my name's Rose. Tat's a sort of plant. We might be related. I'm talking to a twig."

   In the hall the small people are wheeling the TARDIS away. "Oi, now, careful with that. Park it properly. No scratches," the Doctor says. One of them hands (Y/N) a ticket. It says on one side- Have A Nice Day. 

   "Rose? Are you in there?" (Y/N) asks walking into the Gallery. "Aye, aye. What do you think, then?"

   "Great. Yeah, fine. Once you get past the slightly psychic paper. They're just so alien. The aliens are so alien. You look at them and they're so alien."

   "Good thing we didn't take you to the Deep South," the Doctor says walking in sitting next to (Y/N).

   "Where are you from?" Rose asks the two.

   "All over the place," the Doctor smiles.

   "They all speak English."

   "No, you just hear English. It's a gift of the TARDIS. The telepathic field, gets inside your brain and translates."

   "It's inside my brain?"

   "Well, in a good way," (Y/N) says, trying to calm Rose down.

   "Your machine gets inside my head. It gets inside and it changes my mind, and you didn't even ask?"

   "I don't think about it like that," (Y/N) says, watching as Rose gets angry. She stays calm.

   "No, you were too busy thinking up cheap shots about the Deep South. Who are you, then, Doctor? (Y/N)? What are you called? What sort of alien are you?" Rose says.

   "Just the Doctor, just (Y/N)." 

   "From what planet?"

   "Well, it's not as if you'll know where it is!" the Doctor says. (Y/N) grabs his hand gently, remembering her home and friends.

   "Where are you from?"

   What does it matter?"

   "Tell me who you are!"

   "This is who we are, right here, right now, alright? All that counts is here and now, and the is us."

   "Yeah, and I'm here too because you two brought me here, so just tell me."

   "Earth Death in twenty minutes. Earth Death in twenty minutes," the intercom says.

   "Alright. As my mate Shareen says, don't argue with the designated driver," Rose says taking out her mobile phone. "Can't exactly call for a taxi. There's no signal. We're out of range. Just a bit."

   "Tell you what," (Y/N) takes Rose's phone apart sonic-ing it. "With a little bit of jiggery pokery-"

   "Is that a technical term, Jiggery pokery?" the Doctor asks.

   "Yeah, I came first in jiggery pokery. What about you?"

   "No, I failed hullabaloo." The three chuckle.

   "There you go," (Y/N) hands Rose her phone back.

   "Mum?" Rose says into the phone. Rose talks to her mum on the phone. "No. I'm fine. Top of the World." (Y/N) and the Doctor smile at Rose.

   "Think that's amazing, you want to see the bill."

   "That was five billion years ago. So, she's dead now. Five billion years later, my mum's dead."

   "Bundle of laughs, you are," the Doctor says. (Y/N) smacks his shoulder. The space station shakes. "That's not supposed to happen."