Never Not You (Completed)

Chapter 13

Today, Arthit and Ruby are meeting up at a cafe in the Siam Paragon mall. Arthit spots Ruby sitting near a window table. She waves to him to let him know she's over there. Arthit quickly goes to her, and sees she has already ordered their favorite drink.

Arthit: Hey, did you wait long? Sorry, traffic was very bad. It was hard to find parking too.

Ruby: No worries P'. I just got here not long ago. I ordered our drinks, but if you want anything else, you can order it.

Arthit: No, this is enough. I ate at my mom's house before coming.

Ruby: P' can I tell you something? Promise not to freak out.

Arthit: Sure, I promise.

Ruby: I'm a lesbian. I've never been in a relationship, but I'm drawn to other women.

Arthit was surprised. Not by the fact that Ruby was a lesbian, but by how easy it was for her to just admit it.

Arthit: Thanks for trusting me. I think you are you no matter what sex you choose to love. And I like you for you. Is this a secret? I mean does your family and friends know?

Ruby: I've told my parents and my friends. My parents say as long as I'm happy. They are very supportive, and my friends too.

Arthit: Hold on then. Why did you even go out with me in the first place?

Ruby: Well, my grandma is the one that insisted I go out with you. Even my dad tried to tell her the truth about me, but at the end I told him not to. So, I agreed to go out with you. But I'm glad I did. Now, it's like I have a brother.

Arthit nods at the ear to ear smile Ruby is sporting at him, and smiles back.

Ruby: I think I have a crush too P'. Although, I don't know what to do about it. She doesn't even know I exist.

Arthit: Have you tried talking to her? Maybe you're not as invisible as you think you are. You're very cute you know.

Arthit chuckles. While Ruby rolls her eyes.

Ruby: Well, if I'm so cute, why haven't you fallen for me? Not that I want you to. Anyway, who are you hung up on? Don't tell me nobody, because I can tell just by looking at the way you stare at nom yen (pink milk).

Arthit decides to tell Ruby the his story since she was so open and honest to tell him about herself.

Ruby: Hold up there P', so essentially you royally fucked up. You were afraid of other people judging you, so you pushed your love away. You broke his damn heart, and made him leave. Now, he is really gone, and you are still in pieces. You justified your cowardly behaviors with "for his own good" (making quotation gestures with her fingers) excuses. I'm so disappointed in you P'. How can you hurt the one you love like that?

Arthit didn't think Ruby was going to be this direct. He felt verbally slapped across the face. All his friends have more or less said the same thing, but always just soft blows. Ruby dished it to him in a knockout punch.

Arthit: I just want him to be happy, and not have to worry about people judging him. He comes from a prestigious family, and our type of relationship would only taint his family's reputation. I would only complicate his life.

Ruby: Have you ever asked Khun Kongpob? I'm sure he is well aware of his own family background, yet he still chose to be with you. He was willing to give you his heart, and you broke it.

Arthit: He was young. He just didn't think of the consequences of his actions. And even if he was aware, isn't it better that he won't have to go through it now.

Ruby: If you're asking me, two broken hearts don't sound that great to me. Khun Kongpob sounds like a very intelligent person, I'm sure he would have been able to handle the consequences. Just face it, you were just scared.

Ruby scrowls at Arthit with challenging eyes. Arthit looks down acknowledging defeat.

Ruby: P', aren't you tired of missing him? Do you still love him? Be honest with yourself.

Arthit: I do miss him. Everyday. He has been gone two years now, and I'm still stuck. I've tried to move on, but I just can't seem to let him go.

Ruby: Is he coming back? Do you know?

Arthit: I know he is coming back next month. He had finished his master's program.

Ruby: How do you know this P'? Do you stalk his Facebook and Instagram?

Arthit: No, but we have mutual friends that told me.

Ruby: So do you plan to do anything?

Arthit: Well, two years is a long time. He has probably moved on already. There's always all these girls around him, and even guys. So, maybe he has someone by now.

Ruby: P', what if he gets another boyfriend?

Arthit: No way. He says he was never attracted to any guys before he met me.

Ruby: Fine P', say he has a girlfriend, are you just going to let it be. Will you at least let him know that you still love him?

Arthit: If he has a girlfriend, then I would be happy for him. That's what I wanted for him, simple happiness. Besides, I have no right to disturb him now.

Ruby: This is bullshit. You need to tell him you still love him, and let him decide. Maybe he still loves you P'. Give him and yourself a fair chance. Promise me you'll tell him.

That night Arthit had a hard time falling asleep. Ruby's words kept playing over and over in Arthit's mind. He got up after laying in bed for more than two hours not finding sleep. He walked out to his balcony, and looked up to the moon. "Are you happy?" he asked.

It's at times like these that he wished Kongpob was there with him, wrapping his arms around his waist.

Remembering that time Kongpob hugged him from the behind, and softly kissed the side of his neck, and nibbled his ear. He pulled away from Kongpob because he got so shy and went back inside the room. Kongpob whined and followed him inside. They ended up cuddling all night after making love.

Arthit misses Kongpob's love and warm smiles. Kongpob will be back soon, but will he still want me?

AN: Kongpob is coming back. Do you think he's still hung up on Arthit?