Bullied
Bullying: making fun of someone for there appearance, state of mind or for something that happen to someone.
I think bullying .. is the most worse thing anyone can go through.. having to hear people talk about you all over school because of something that happen to you?
It's horrible.
What happen between me and Alexander traveled around the school bad.
All everyone can talk about was me.
And everyone saw me like a slut , a whore , a ho.
I just wanted to die .. I always use to think I was worthless .. I wasn't worth living
I didn't deserve to be alive.
I hated myself so much
" did you hear about what happen to Lesley ? "
" she's such a ho , why is she sending nudes ? "
" she is such a whore "
" she should go kill herself "
I mean you , yourself .. what would you do in that kind of situation ?
What I did was cover myself with blankets and cry myself to sleep
I felt so alone
I felt like the entire world was against me
I never thought I would have experienced something as horrible as that .. i just wished I wasn't alive , i just wanted to kill myself.
Every night around 2 am
I'd stay up , crying horribly.
Smoking weed
Listening to sad music
Cutting myself
I had cut myself on my wrist , and thighs
I just really didn't care anymore
I was destined to kill myself
Now what I will share with you is something very personal for me.
I wrote my suicide letter , which I typed on my phone wanting for whoever found my dead body to save my phone and read the letter
I still have it to this day
My suicide letter.
By: Lesley Gomez
Hello .. to whoever found my body.. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything I caused you guys, I had to do what I had to do, I just felt like if I died , I would have caused so much more trouble to my family, I love you guys so fucking much. I'm so sorry for being such a horrible friend , sister , cousin , and daughter .. or girlfriend ..
I'm so sorryI began to write my suicide letter because I did want to kill my self , I was not afraid this time.
So I started to plan what I wanted to do.
I grabbed a bottle of ibuprofen that belonged to my mom , and I put it in my drawer , I grabbed razors and I stashed them in my drawer as well and a rope.
I then hid it under my clothes
i sat on my bed and stared at my drawers.
and i asked myself, im i actually going to do this ?
i hated myself so much i just wanted to get rid of this pain so bad. i mean during that time i had a few friends on my side.. even stephany and danna who you already learned about confronted alexander and cussed him out for me.
alexander was the one who made everything worse, he was the one who told people that i sent a bunch of videos and pictures,, which i did not, i just sent two and because he asked me to. he just said so many things so people would have been against me instead of him.
because of what happen, he moved out of the classes me and him had together and then after that he moved to texas, and thats where things started to dial down a little bit.
one day he texted me and told me that it was my fault that no one wants to date him, he asked a girl out one day and someone from ofarrell told her to search him up online and found out and i have no idea how since the information about juviniles cannot be released online , that he was a registered juvenile sex ofender for a year.
that actually made me feel kind of better.
what happen between us finally got to him and reuined something in his life
when he was in 7th grade with me, no one was against him.. probably 5 or 6 people were..
everyone else hated me and could not stop talking about me at all..
but i mean what was suppose to do?
i hated everything so much.
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