Children of Fire (Complete)

fourteen

Gideon

Crystal had been the one to follow me upstairs, why was I not surprised? She had been trying to become my Old Lady for years, and I could see why she would think it was a possibility. She was always around, an easy lay, someone who was there when I needed her. I didn't confide anything in her, and I couldn't trust her with anything club related, but she was always willing to do whatever she could to help ease my anxiety and frustration, and for that-- I was grateful. It was easy to distract myself with her, and only focus on what we were doing--or she was doing-- at that moment.

"Gideon, baby, what can I do for you?" She asked, her voice sultry and low. She sauntered towards me, slowly sliding off the string of her barely-there tank top. I stared at her for a moment, her long blonde hair used to be mesmerizing, and it called to me like a sirens song. Her overly plump, bright pink lips used to kiss away my troubles, and I found myself feeling almost happy- normal. But tonight, all I could see when I looked at her were long dark waves. Bright green eyes, perfect dark red lips, freckles, and just as many tattoos as I had myself. I met her gaze, and instead of her hooded eyelids, all I could see were bright green eyes, rimmed with tears. Damnit, get out of my head, Emerson. I can't believe I had fucked up so badly-- I had scared her beyond anything I could have imagined, and she just stood there and took it. She didn't cry in front of everyone, she didn't beg me to stop shouting at her, she just stood there tall and proud, waiting for the worst of it to be over. The way a woman like myself needed would.

The door barged open suddenly, bringing me out of my thoughts— Killian made his way towards me, closing the gap between us in three large strides. He bumped his shoulder into Crystal and she stumbled out of the way, gasping and pouting in the corner of the room now.

"You're a fucking idiot." He hissed at me, his eyes narrowed and his shoulders were lifting due to his heavy breathing. I hadn't seen him this angry in a while, not since the day Kara died. What was his problem? Emerson wasn't his, and as far as I knew, they hadn't spent much time together... had they?

"Don't talk to me like that." I told him, standing up straight and stepping closer to him. Our faces only inches apart.

"You don't deserve her, after the way you just treated her. You don't even deserve to look at her after that." Killian told me, his eyes never leaving mine. My best friend was standing in front of me, confronting me about a woman we had barely known more than a month. What a brave, valiant soul he was.

"You don't have the right to come in here and tell me what I do and don't deserve, especially when it comes to a woman." I told him, my voice never wavering. I made sure to ooze authority, trying to let him know he was out of line without ever saying it, although I knew he was perfectly justified in telling me I had screwed up. I knew I had, he knew I had, hell... we all knew I had screwed up. Except for maybe Crystal, I guess it was a win in her book. Not that I cared anymore.

"She didn't know! She didn't even know who they were, hell, nobody here did. She took off, she wouldn't even let anyone give her a ride home. She just took off running, crying. She might not even be safe out there, right now. And it's your fucking fault. If anything happens to her on her way home, that's on you!" Killian was shouting now, jabbing his finger in my face. He was right, and I knew he was. I was angry at myself, and for once, I was scared. Scared for her, scared that by being associated with me, she would be drug into this dangerous lifestyle. And I let my fear take over me.

I pulled my arm back and before Killian even had a moment to register what was happening, my fist collided with the side of his face, sending him staggering backwards. I don't know why I hit him, I don't even know why I allowed myself to get so worked up. I didn't want to hit him, because he was right. And I knew it. But I took advantage of the situation and hit him as hard as I could. He was just as strong as me, and a punch like that could have sent a normal man to his knees, but Killian shook it off and stepped in front of me, breathing heavily. Would he hit me? Please, hit me back. I deserve it. As if he could read my thoughts, he brought his face closer to mine and through clenched teeth, said "I won't give you the satisfaction of hitting you back. I hope this ruins you, and I hope it eats you from the inside out, you selfish fucking bastard." And with that, he turned and stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him.