Kellen POV;
I stretch out in my bed as I gradually open my eyes, woken up by the uncomfortable weight pinned to my body and pressing me lightly into my memory foam mattress. I glance down and remember the night before as I look down on the maid whose naked body is pressed against mine. Her eyes flutter meaningfully up at me conveying her adoration as she takes in my features, at the same time her hand strokes from my hairline down the side of my face. "Well good morning Handsome." She greets kissing my chest. My wolf bristles at what he now considers a trespasser in his bed; he willing tolerated her last night since she was a means of taking out our frustration at not having our mate yet, now she was just an irritation to us both.
"Hi." I say awkwardly as I move to sit up. The maid rolled off me, frowning at my less than warm reception. Pulling on my boxers, I stand and stretch fully before turning to the maid, whose name I think was Evet, or at least something like that - it definitely began with E... or did it begin with I? I couldn't really remember. I was tired.
Another night where pointless sex had failed to fill the gap I knew a mate should fill. It took out my frustration for a while but that was about it. It didn't give me the kind of satisfaction I knew my wolf and I were waiting for. Maybe... maybe the next one will be different? Maybe if I could just find the right damn girl to sleep with then this aching frustration will go away. It was a long shot but what harm could it do? "What's wrong your Majesty?" The maid called after me as I headed for my bathroom.
"Erm, you might want to get ready for your duties or whatever it is you have to do, probably wouldn't be a good idea if you're still here when I get out the shower." I tell her awkwardly, which was the nicest way I'd come up with for telling each girl I slept with, usually maids, to get out. The girl looked affronted - no surprise there then - and pulled the quilt up to her neck.
"So, you basically want me to get out?" She asked in part confusion, part angry betrayal. I shrugged; turning toward the bathroom again when she asked the same accusing questions they all usually did, "but what about last night? Did that mean nothing to you?" I was too tired for this.
"What did you expect? Really?" I ask rhetorically, "that because we spent one night together, we're 'meant to be'? Newsflash love, I'm a Prince. A werewolf Prince at that. Do you really think a kingdom wants a maid as a future Queen? 'Cause I'm pretty sure fate has chosen me a mate who will be in every way, shape and form fitted for that."
"Then what the hell was the point in last night?!" She cries emotionally. I shrug again, leaning against the bathroom doorframe, staring at the maid as tears stream down her face; they always looked younger when they cried, which of course always made me feel that much freaking worse about myself. It wasn't like I was happy about these ridiculous one night stands that I'd taken to; they only made me unhappy anyway, but was I going to stop? No - for reasons even I couldn't fathom. Maybe it was the smug victory I felt when charming them into spending a night with me, or maybe just because I didn't want to sleep alone when I knew I could entice someone into sleeping with me? I had no idea.
The girl quickly jumped out of the bed, hurrying to put her maid uniform on and gather any other belongings she'd brought with her. "I-th-thought we had something special!" She yells feebly and then, just like all the others had, leaves -slamming the door behind her.
"Nothing new there then." I mutter, rolling my eyes as I head into the bathroom, feeling exhausted before the day had even begun. Good riddance! Thinks my wolf as he settles down to go back to sleep.
The memory morphs into another...
"I'VE HAD ENOUGH KELLEN!" yells the King finally, struggling to keep his temper and wolf in check. Taking several supposedly calming breaths and pinching the bridge of his nose, he then continues in a strained, tight voice. "I've tried to understand, tried to reason where this behaviour has come from - this sleeping around - but I can't and I've had ENOUGH of it!" There was no leniency in his tone.
Father had spent the last, I don't know how long yelling at me; the scary part was that this was a terrifying side of him I'd never seen before. Behind my blank expression, I was shocked and, dare I say it, scared. Thankfully I could tell by his now calmer tone that he'd passed the yelling stage. He continued "I don't even want to think about the number of younger girls I've either had to let go or transfer, yet alone the number of people I've had to persuade to keep quiet about all this. I'm well passed being disappointed... I'm ashamed!" He spat angrily. "Ashamed...OF MY OWN SON!" He yells slamming his fist on his desk before bitterly laughing without humour. "The same son the kingdom is expecting to one day become their KING! Ha. Ha. Ha." Turning away from me in disgust, Father looks out his study window.
"Why Kellen?" Asks Mom, speaking gravelly and for the first time since I'd been called in here. They'd asked me this before and my answer had been a shrug in a 'why not' gesture but that was before they knew the extent of my behaviour...before there was the scare of one of my one night stands being pregnant. That was the final straw for my parents, who'd tried so hard to give me the benefit of the doubt.
My mother's desperate tone enticed me into giving an answer, even if I wasn't entirely sure of my own motives. I shifted uncomfortably, frowning at the floor, "I don't know why..." I sigh, deciding to try and explain how I'd been feeling recently, "I can feel what I'm missing. It's frustrating knowing that one day I'll have what Maxim has. My wolf feels... restless..." I say, trying to find the right words "...incomplete!" Mom nods, understanding crossing her expression briefly before sadness settled in her features.
"Have you ever considered that when you find your mate, she may well reject you in light of your recent behaviour?" Spoke Dad stiffly, his back still to me. It took a moment as the words sunk in before the weight of what he'd just said fully impacted me. I felt like the floor just fell out from under me and in the scramble I had grabbed onto a ledge and was holding on for dear life...
With a start, I wake up sweating; smothered by my quilts, which had wrapped around my waist like a snake suffocating its prey. Scrambling from my bed, I run to my bathroom - making it just in time to throw up in the toilet, my body's way of dispelling the haunting memories. The ball of bile in my throat proving as hard to swallow as the words my father spoke to me that day. The truth of them terrified me like nothing else could. God, I was such an arse back then!
Now that I'd found my mate - my beautiful, mysterious Ana - she may well reject me if she found out. My conscious had, once again, been awoken to the memories I'd very much like to forget. All thanks to Bell's troublesome friend, I thought bitterly. Looking back on my behaviour through those memories I couldn't blame Dad and everyone else for being ashamed of me, I was ashamed of me. My younger, naïve, ignorant and self-absorbed self was a humiliation - a mockery even - to look back on. Dad's words to me had cut deep; among the other things he'd said, he'd made me grow up that day, which was one of the many things I was thankful for now. I needed to hear those words, no matter how much it hurt to hear him say them.
After dragging myself into the shower, I dressed and decided to go find Dad. I wasn't going to make the mistake of not confiding in anyone about this kind of stuff again and considering that Dad been mated longer, I hoped he would have more general knowledge on how to handle the panic that had slowly been creeping up on me since last night. That in mind, I head out of my room to find Dad...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey guys! Soooo what are we thinking now?!
I'd like to hear some of your opinions before my upload this afternoon! :D
Much love <3
YOU ARE READING
PROWESS. (COMPLETED)
WerewolfProwess (ˈpraʊɪs) 1. Outstanding or superior skill or ability. 2. Bravery or fearlessness, esp in battle. The Prowess - Title chosen and given to the first female Alphress, in the history of werewolves. In man's world being taken seriously is a st...