You Are So Beautiful To Me...

Chapter 15

Camila's pov

Have you ever felt like you had to live up to an expectation...how you felt you had to worry about the smallest thing and look a certain way and be ready for anything? But in the moments of feeling so anxious and lost and knowing what is expected because you thought it was right...there came the most unexpected thing in your life that made you see that glimpse of happiness, and feel the safest you thought you couldn't be.

Well that's what if felt for me.

After my date with Lauren i couldn’t wait to see her again. To kiss her lips once more...Having the feeling of a hundred butterflies erupt in my stomach and my lips tingle as my heart races every time I thought about when we’d meet. Or how I replay every moment with her in my head, fighting off the huge grin that wouldn’t leave my lips.

I’ve never once thought about someone this way but i’ve read a million words that could have given me insight, but I had other things blinding me of what I could experience.

I fell asleep that night like i was in heaven and woke up with not a care in the world but one thought on my mind: Lauren.

I know I wouldn't see her, only maybe at work but god was it weird that i just wanted to meet up with her now? 

I shook my head at the thought, maybe if I sent her a text or called? But being the first real thing with anyone i wouldn't want to over step.

I tried riding my thoughts of the most ridiculous ideas before my head exploded. I still had yet to tell Dinah about what was going on because I could tell she had an idea of why I was in a good mood and her mischievous look gave her away on various accounts.

I hadn’t told her about me and Lauren but i was planning on it i just wanted to keep things between me and Lauren for now.

It’s different when you end up telling people about things like this because it doesn’t just become a thing between two people. It becomes a thing between everyone but the two people. I’m guessing this is how celebrities feel until the pope have uncovered there private lives and make the whole relationship about what everyone else's opinions are.

Don’t get me wrong i am dying to tell Dinah and maybe the other girls but not now. At least not yet.

I was sitting at my desk at work and just going over paper after paper and trying to make sense of it all. I've gotten the hang of things here but I still needed help on a few things sometimes. Lauren helped me out with that but i managed to do things without always needing some help from my officials.

Otherwise I wouldn't be what my father expects from me.

I shook my head and rolled my eyes just at the thought of my father and his entitlement he has on me about being persistent about this kind of job and business.

Today he emailed some facts about the projects and contracts to the J’s project and others more like the Hansens.

He emailed saying to look over them and that he would be in touch about it all.

That’s something I dreaded, ever since he left for his business trip. It felt nice not having my father here to boss me around and tell me how I should act and look and be up to his shoulders in business contracts and bla bla bla bla bla.

But there was a time when I'd miss him and did not want him to go. I would take any chance I could, to talk to him when he would come home or show me about what he had done while he was gone. But somewhere along the way, I realized it was never anything we could bond over like I would with my mother. And soon enough, I couldn't recognize my father for who he was before all this that lies in front of me.