a Big Mess of Weird Stuff

September 2019

The 25th of September (a Wednesday)

17.31

I don't really think I am up to anything interesting lately or something that no one already knows. It sounds sad, I know. But it is not like I am doing nothing, but it is just school and some people that are nice and funny and great, and people that I just accept and tolerate, but not really like and then there are assholes.

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I had to dance to Sucker by the Jonas Brothers. (And check my phone)

How y'all doing??

I had a party last Saturday and I was a little bit tipsy, a tiny little bit tipsy. Hehe.

Some asshole ruined a bit of a party because he was handsy and wanted to go to the bathroom with me (for some strange reason), but some friends of mine held him back and he dropped coke on my tee. Asshole. After all, the party was fun. I have no idea how crazy I went. But I can for sure say that I wasn't the most normal one.

Today, I felt like I was in freaking primary school. Some guy was blowing kisses to me and he is strange but nice. I blushed and Dorine said 'you are getting red' and I was like 'noooo' and then my face became tomato red. Yay. Freaking yay.

I cringed so hard.

The 29th of September (a Sunday)

17.34

I cannot keep it in. I know people are going to read this that know me in real life, but hey, fuck it.

Okay, so I had a party last night. Drank a little bit too much, but it was fun. Then I went to bed, and I dreamt over a certain someone... He said to me: 'I like you so much and I want to be your boyfriend.' And I was so freakin happy that when I woke up, I sort of thought it actually happened, but then reality hit me in the face. And I was like 'shit, I really really like this guy.' I went back to sleep.

Now it is daylight and I am so confused. I have no idea what he thinks of me and what the hell my mind does to me. I am literally freaking out because it is a very long time I felt this way and when I felt that way, I did not end well.

You know, the weird thing is I don't even know shit about him, but I want so desperately that he messages me today to ask when we should meet up. But I am also stressed because now too many people know about this.

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Sup? 

Short chapter, I know. As you can read above, I am a little confused. Right now, I am not as confused as I was there, because I will see. I don't want to think about that shit too much, I only confuse myself then. 

Goodday, everyone!