Pain & Love

Chapter 1

Erin's POV

"Beep... Beep... Beep..."

I grumbled and reached over to shut my annoying alarm clock off. I looked at the clock, realizing that I only managed to get in 1 hour of sleep after crying myself to sleep, just like every night since she died. Groaning, I forced myself to wake up and get out of bed. I dragged my feet and went to the bathroom, looking at myself in the mirror. Staring at my reflection, all I could see was a failure, someone who got her best friend killed. My thoughts went to Nadia once again, just like it had been since the day I found her lifeless body lying on the sand. Everywhere I look, I see her face. Not the face of a sweet, smiling, happy, laughing Nadia, but the face of a hurt, lifeless, beaten up, abused Nadia. Every time I close my eyes, Yates' evil smiling face and Nadia's pain etched face haunted my dreams. "She would probably have had a longer life out on the streets as a drug addict than living with you. You wanted to be the hero, wanted to be the person Voight was to you to someone else, and now she's dead. That's your fault. You got her killed. You just had to interfere with her life, didn't you? Failure. Bad news. Addict." As my thoughts started to run wild, I quickly splashed my face with cold water in an attempt to get rid of those thoughts and started getting ready. With minimal makeup on and my hair up in a messy bun, I briskly went to grab a random outfit. I glanced at the small orange bottle standing on my nightstand, forcing myself to not succumb to my wants and desire. But after staring at it for a couple of seconds, all my self-control went down the drain, as if there was a strong magnetic pull that I just can't deny. I quickly grabbed the bottle and took some of its contents, needing anything to drown out all the guilt and numb the pain. Soon after, I took my keys and bag, and headed out the door, driving to the district. I wasn't in the mood to do anything else, not even to eat. I felt like I was going through the motions nowadays. Routine after routine. Day after day.

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Hey guys! This the first fanfic I have ever written. I hope you guys will enjoy reading this fanfic. Your inputs will be greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading!

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