After (Jikook version)

Chapter 52

When Jungkook finally breaks our kiss, he sits on my bed and I join him. 

We're quiet for a few minutes, so I begin to feel nervous, like there is some way I should be behaving now that we are . . . more, but I have no clue what way that is. 

"What do you have planned for the rest of the day?" he asks. 

"Nothing, just studying," I say. 

"Cool." He clicks his tongue onto the roof of his mouth. He seems nervous, too, and I am glad it isn't just me. 

"Come here." Jungkook beckons me and opens his arms. 

The moment I sit on his lap, the door opens and he groans. Hoseok, Taehyung, and Yoongi all pour in and then stare at us as I climb off Jungkook and sit on the other side of the bed. 

"So are you guys like fuck buddies now?" Yoongi says plainly. 

"No! We aren't!" I squeak. I don't know what I should tell them, so I just wait for Jungkook to say something. He stays quiet as V and Yoongi begin to talk to him about the party last night. 

"It seems I didn't miss much," Jungkook says to them, and Yoongi shrugs. 

"Until Molly gave us a strip show; she got completely naked, you should have been there," Yoongi replies. I cringe and look toward Hoseok, who is staring at V, probably hoping he isn't going to comment on Molly being naked. 

Jungkook smiles. "Nothing I haven't seen before." 

I gasp, then try to conceal it as a cough. He did not just say that. 

His face falls, seeming to understand what he just did. 

Maybe this was a terrible idea; it is already sort of awkward, and now that everyone is in the room it's magnified. Why didn't he tell them we were dating? Are we dating? I don't really understand, myself. I thought after his confession that we were, but we never actually said it. Maybe we don't need to? This uncertainty is already driving me crazy; the entire time I have been with Seulgi I have never had to worry about her feelings for me. I never had to deal with ex-friends with benefits—I am the only boy Seulgi has ever kissed in her life, and honestly I like it that way. I wish Jungkook had never done anything with another girl or boy, or at least had done things with fewer of them. 

"We're going bowling after I change. Do you want to come?" J-Hope asks and I shake my head. 

"I have to catch up on my studying. I have barely gotten any done this weekend," I tell him and look away as the memories of this weekend flood through my mind. 

"You should come, it will be fun," Jungkook says, but I shake my head. I really need to stay in, and I was sort of hoping he would stay with me. Hoseok steps into the closet and returns a few minutes later with different clothes on. 

"Ready, guys? You're sure you don't want to come?" he asks me. 

I nod. "I'm sure." 

They all get up to leave, and Jungkook gives me a wave and a small smile before exiting the room. I'm disappointed with Jungkook's goodbye, and hope that he'd made these plans before this weekend together and the drama today. 

But what did I expect? For him to rush over and kiss me, tell me he would miss me? I laugh at the thought. I don't know if anything will even change between Jungkook and me besides us actively trying to avoid one another. I am too used to how things are with Seulgi, so I have no idea how this is going to be, and I hate not having control over every situation. 

After an hour of studying and attempting to take a nap, I grab my phone to text Jungkook. Wait, I don't even have his number. I had never thought about it before; we have never talked on the phone or texted before. We never needed to; we couldn't stand each other. This is going to be more complicated than I thought.