After (Jikook version)

Chapter 62

After class I say goodbye to Jin and walk straight to the professor to explain my absences. He congratulates me on my internship and explains that he rearranged the syllabus a little. I keep our conversation going until Jungkook exits the room. 

I make my way back to my room, where I lay out all my notes and textbooks on my bed. I try to study but feel on edge waiting for Hoseok, Jungkook, or one of the many other people who are always in and out of my room, to show up. I pack my study materials into my bag and head to my car. I will find a place to study off campus, maybe a coffee shop. 

Driving toward town, I spy a small library on the corner of a busy street. Only a few cars are in the lot, so I pull in. I walk all the way to the back of the library and sit next to the window, pulling all of my books and notes out so I can get to work. For the first time, I can study in peace, no distractions. This will be my new sanctuary, the perfect place to study. 

"Mister, we are closing in five minutes," an elderly librarian comes over to inform me. 

Closing? Looking out the window, I see that it is dark out. I didn't even notice the sun going down. I was so engrossed in my books, hours passed and I didn't even notice. I will definitely have to come here more often. 

"Oh, okay, thank you," I reply and pack up my things. Checking my phone, I see a new text from Namjoon. 

*I just wanted to tell you goodnight, I can't wait for Friday. * He really is very nice, so I reply: * That is very sweet, thank you. I am looking forward to it too. *

Back in the room, Hoseok is still gone, so I change into my pajamas and grab Wuthering Heights. I fall asleep quickly, dreaming of Heathcliff and the moors. 

When I wake up on Friday, I have a text message from Jin telling me that he won't be on campus at all today because Irene ,his girlfriend, is arriving earlier than he thought. Skipping Literature crosses my mind momentarily, but I decide against it. I can't let Jungkook ruin anything else I like. 

I take a little more time to get ready today and curl my hair a bit. It's supposed to be warm, so I wear a purple sleeveless fleece jacket and jeans. When I go to the coffeehouse before class, Yoongi ends up in front of me in line. Before I can walk away unnoticed, he turns around.

"Hey, Jimin," he says. 

"Hey, Yoongi. How are you?" I ask politely. 

"I'm good, you coming tonight?" 

"To the bonfire?" 

"No, the party. The bonfire is going to be lame, it always is." 

"Oh well, I'm going to the bonfire." I laugh lightly and he chuckles. 

"Well, if you get bored, you can always stop by," he says and grabs his coffee. 

I thank him as he walks away, relieved that Jungkook's group seems uninterested in the bonfire, which means I won't have to deal with any of them tonight. 

When it's time for Literature, I walk right to my seat without a single glance in Jungkook's direction. The discussion continues on Wuthering Heights, but Jungkook stays silent. As soon as we are dismissed, I gather my things and practically bolt to the door. 

"Jimin!" I hear Jungkook call behind me, but I just walk faster. Without Jin here I feel more vulnerable. When I reach the sidewalk, I feel a light touch on my arm. I know it's him from the way my skin tingles. 

"What!" I shout. 

He takes a step back and holds out a notebook. "You dropped this." 

Relief and disappointment battle inside me. I wish this ache in my chest would go away. Instead of shrinking, it seems to get larger every moment of every day. I shouldn't have admitted to myself that I love him—if I would have kept ignoring the truth, maybe it would hurt less.