Love Stories Over A Cup Of Coffee

Americano

When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was P'Ohm. He looked relieved to see me wake up. He is holding my left hand tightly.

"How are you feeling?" He asked me, still holding my hand.

"I'm feeling fine now, P'." He let out a sigh of relief.

"We're all so worried about you last night." He said.

What happened last night? I can't remember anything. The last thing I can remember is that I'm waiting for P'Ohm at the beach. What could have happened that made everyone worried?

We heard a continuous knocking on the door. P'Ohm opened it and P'Kao hurriedly come inside the room.

He hugged me tightly. That was the first thing he did. This is weird. He will never do this. Unless...

"How are you feeling right now?" He asked me while checking the temperature on my forehead.

"I'm feeling fine, P'."

"There's nothing hurting?" He asked me again.

"None, P."

He let out a sigh.

"A doctor checked him yesterday. He said Fluke is fine. His temperature, blood pressure. It's just that his heartbeat was kinda faster than normal." P'Sing informed P'Kao. P'Kao just nodded.

P'Sing and the others left. It was just P'Ohm and P'Kao who stayed. Actually P'Kao asked P'Ohm to stay.

"Can you tell me what happened last night?" P'Kao began. P'Ohm nodded. "Let's go outside-"

"P'Kao, it's okay." I assured him that it is okay for me to listen to what really happened last night.

"Okay, then. What happened Ohm?"

"We were playing a game P. Fluke was inside the forest so I told him to find the shore if he is near there. He was able to get out of the forest. He waited for me along the shore. Actually I was near him when it started to rain so hard."

"Were there lightning? And thunder?" P'Kao asked.

"Yes, P. There were conservative lightnings and thunder. When I reached him, he's hugging his knees. He was shaking. Maybe because it's cold. When I grabbed him, he suddenly started crying and started begging."

"What did he say?" P'Kao wanted to hear this because this is the most important part.

"He kept on saying, "please, please don't leave me."" P'Ohm looked at me. His eyes told me he is very worried about me. I just gave him the brightest smile I can give him at that moment.

"Thank you. Thank you for your help" said P'Kao.

P'Ohm just nodded. I feel like he wanted to say something.

"Do you want to say something?" P'Kao suddenly asked as if he's reading my mind.

It took a while for P'Ohm to respond.

"I know this might be a personal matter, but I'm really concerned about Fluke. I wanted to know what is happening. I want to help him the best that I can."

P'Kao looked at me. I nodded to say that I am fine.

"Okay then, I'll leave the two of you for a while." And he left.

P'Ohm sat on the chair beside the bed. Once again, he took my hand.

"P', do you remember the story about my stepfather?" He nodded. "It was my birthday. I prepared dinner for father and I. I was so excited. But when he got home, he was drunk. He told me everything and left. That night, there was a storm. It was raining hard. There was thunder and lightning. Those were the things I remember vividly that night. Since then, it was hard for me to bear the rain, thunder and lightning. I'm sacred everytime it rains. It was so severe that I couldn't go outside even when it was just drizzling."

P'Ohm smiled at me. His eyes still twinkling. Despite my story, I did not see pity in his eyes.

I smiled back at him. And that's when I felt my tears falling. He immediately wiped them with his hand.

"Can I hug you?" He asked me. I smiled at him while trying to stop my tears from flowing.

He hugged me so tightly. He did not say a word. He just hugged me.

"P'Ohm, don't worry about me. I found a family who trully adores me. They helped me recover. I haven't experienced any episode since yesterday." I assured him. He let me go.

"And that is worrisome. What could have triggered it." I can hear the concern in his voice.

"Maybe I was just too tired P. And maybe because it just rained all of a sudden." I smiled at him, that's all I can do.

He looked intensely at me in the eyes. He took my hand and held it tightly.

"Always remember that I will be here for you, okay?" I nodded. "I will patiently wait for you."

"So, did your visit to the hospital gave you answers as to what triggered you?" P'Kao asked me as he sat down beside me. I'm at the pool side, with my feet in the water.

"Yes, P." I was expecting P'Kao to ask further but he just keep quiet. He just stayed there beside me. "P', is there something wrong?" I asked him.

"Nothing, really. Your Master just wanted me to make sure you are alright."

"Wow. Amazing. Master really has that kind of effect on you, P'." Master is the only one who can boss around P'Kao.

"Not really. I just don't want your Master to nag me all day." I really wanted to tease him but he might get angry. "Why do you even call him Master? Master of love? You and I know enough that his heart has been broken many times." P'Kao is talking a lot when talking about Master.

"I know, P. But we also both know that despite all the heartbreaks, Master was able to get up, and move on. And I idolize him for that. Besides, you know why I do not call him Earth. It's really confusing when we talk." I explained.

"We can easily know when you talk about Earth, your mentor, and Earth, your master, because they are total opposites." P'Kao said in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Still, P. I get confuse with those two Earth."

"Wait a minute, why is this conversation changing topic." I laughed a little bit. He's cute whenever it's Master who is concerned. 

"Okay. Then, let me ask you, P'Kao, why are you not asking me further about the trigger?"

"Ohm." That's all he said. And I froze. He knew it all along? "Don't ask me how I knew about this. As someone who knows your past, I saw this possibility the first time I saw you looking at Ohm, and the first time I saw how he treated  you." He looked at me. "Your past has made you into a person who is very conscious of other people's feelings towards you. You always ask whether you are worthy of people's attention or care, and especially love. When you see a little bit reason to make you believe that you don't deserve anthing, you will likely believe it. Your past has taken all your confidence that at least someone will truly care for you and love you."

How can P'Kao be this observant.

"That's why I'm thankful of father and mother, P. They made sure that I feel their love and care every single day." P'Kao smiled. "And of course, my siblings as well."

"And Ohm." He said. I fell silent. "Ohm's actions have made you feel that you deserve  to be loved. You know, and I know, that you have feelings for him. The only thing that's stopping you from acknowledging it is that you are not confident that you are deserving of his love. And his recent stardom, I believe, has pushed your triggers."

How can P'Kao know me so well. How can he know all of these?

He was right about P'Ohm. Yes, I was worried about gender and what society will say, but as a person who has been left behind, the biggest fear in me, the reason why it is hard for me to admit I like him, is that I might not be deserving enough of what he can offer me.

I really hate this part of me, to be honest.  But I think I can never escape this dark room. Even if my family and friends have given me light, I am still in the dark room. It's just it is a little bit brighter than before.