❝What! Why don't you trust me?❞
❝You want it alphabetized or by date?❞
❝I can't even look at you right now!❞
❝Jake, do you even trust yourself?❞
❝No, but that is not the point.❞
| In which the 99 get more than just a new Captain |
[Brooklyn Nine-Nin...
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SCOREBOARD PERALTA ZAPATA 68 67
"Ugh, Halloween is the worst," Amy groaned, "Everyone's drunk, wearing a mask, and carrying a fake gun. Plus all the girls think they have to dress sexy."
"I know, that is the worst. Please make them stop," Jake smiled sarcastically.
"I passed a slutty tree on the way here. Who wants to have sex with a tree?" She huffed.
"Was it a maple?" Scully asked.
Amy threw a disgusted look his way.
"Was it a maple?" Jake repeated cheekily.
"Why would it matter?" Natasha tilted her head, "Is your sex life that sad now that you want to have sex with a tree?"
Jake's eyes widened. "What? No! That's not why I was asking, you know that."
"It's okay Jake," She patted his shoulder, "We can still be friends even if you think maple trees are sexy."
"I do not think maple trees are-," He cut himself off with a smile, "We're friends."
Natasha smiled. "And you didn't deny that you think maple trees are sexy."
"I was going to and you know that," He huffed.
"Do I? Because I think you're just ashamed of admitting it."
Before Jake could argue with her Charles forced their attention towards him with a fiery red wig.
"Buon Giorno, Buon Giorno," He held his hands out proudly, "Pretty cool 'stume, huh?"
He was wearing cargo shorts, a chef's coat, and a red wig.
"'Stume?" Jake tilted his head.
"Short for costume," Charles explained.
"Charles dresses up for Halloween every year in really weird costumes and we always make fun of him for them," Jake leaned close to Natasha and whispered.
"I feel bad for him but then I look at him and can't help but feel he deserves it," Natasha said, her eyes never leaving Charles as she tried to take in his costume.
Jake laughed before clapping his hands. "All right, let me guess. You are dumpy Chuck Norris."
Charles frowned. "No, I'm-"
"Dumpy Ron Weasley," Rosa cut him off as she walked past him.
"No," He sighed.
"You guys, stop it. He put thought into his costume, and he is obviously Miranda from sex and the City," Terry called from his desk.
"No, he's not," Natasha scoffed, "He's dumpy George Jetson."
Jake held his hand out for a high five at her guess.
