Chapter 33

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by shelbywrite

by shelbywrite

Shawn's POV

Ever since the day at MAGCON, I wanted her. She made me happy. She was literally everything I needed in my life. We had such a great relationship, and she made me feel like I was dating my hopes and dreams. I needed her constantly, every minute of my life, in order to live. Then, I started writing my own music. I was told, by my manager, that I needed a rougher look, instead of the cute Canadian. I knew it was a great idea, and I knew I had to change immediately.

I was okay with it, I made it work. I didn’t tell Kenna, because she didn’t need to know. Until she started with accusations, about me not being sincere in my actions. So, I did what I thought was right. I started making it real. I left her in my apartment, every night, right before she went to sleep, and I left. I went to every club I knew of in Toronto. I stayed out all night, every night. Made out with every girl that talked to me, I even went home with a few. Made sure newspapers saw, and magazine writers were present. I needed to keep up my reputation, and that’s what I did.

Then, I realized that this was my life now, and Kenna didn’t belong in it. So I made her leave, I wanted her out of my life. What we had was gone, and I didn’t even miss her. That life was gone, it was behind me. Some nights, I did miss her. Some nights, I brought a girl home to fill in her place. It wasn’t that bad, and soon I forgot about her. Until, Cameron texted me one day, about a month after we separated, saying I didn’t deserve her anyway. I laughed, I laughed. I didn’t want her anymore. Maybe I didn’t deserve her, but it didn’t really make that much of a difference. Hundreds of girls would kill to spend one night with me, in my apartment, just me and her. She took advantage of it, never thanked me for all that I gave her.

I was so excited to go to LA. It was a sort of a new start, I had stopped writing music for a while, and I felt myself going back to Old Shawn, and I wouldn’t let that happen. I needed to get past the writing block, so I could get back on the charts. Jack G conveniently didn’t tell me that Kenna was living in LA, until we were on the plane here. I wanted to go back, but I knew I couldn’t let people think I’d ran away. He also told me that she was living with Cameron now, for the summer. She was his modeling photographer. I hated to admit it, but she was a fantastic photographer. I found it funny that she moved all the way out here. She really wanted to run away, it was obvious, and she was never in public. Ha, maybe she was with Cameron now. That thought alone pissed me off, but I pushed it away. Good, I hope he screws her over again.

I hated seeing her. Not only her, but the look of her. She looked beautiful, and I fucking hated it. She thought she would just walk straight past us, flaunting herself in very short shorts. I think she thought we wouldn’t notice her. Ha. I snorted. Had she became that kind of person? Wow. Taylor said something to me, telling me to go get her. I knew it was Kenna, I was sure he didn’t. Neither did Matt, but how could I forget the look of her? I wanted to, but I couldn’t. Her hair was different, it was lighter. It fit her well. She had lost maybe 15 pounds, which she didn’t need to lose. She was never big, but now she looked maybe a little too skinny.

But she was still attractive. I scrunched up my nose and looked away. Why did I even bother looking at her? Matthew called to her, and she came back. What was he doing?? I turned my head all the way away, I couldn’t see her eyes. They always had an effect on me, I just couldn’t look. Matthew freaked out, big surprise it was Kenna. Good job Sherlock. I hated him sometimes. Taylor commented on her shorts, and hit my leg. I nodded, and looked over for a matter of seconds, and our eyes met. Her eyes were cold, and lifeless. I noticed something different, the spark. She had always had this spark, a glint in her eyes. It was gone. Her eyes were dead, and sad. I looked away. I couldn’t look any longer. Why had she looked so sad?

Then Taylor stood up, and started yelling at her, with a wicked smile. I wanted to get up, but I was frozen. He said unimaginable things, and I couldn’t believe Kenna just stood there and took it. Her face not changing, as if she heard this daily. He grabbed a small piece of her hair, and twisted it around his finger, so she slapped his hand away. I silently cheered for her, he had no right to touch her. I felt taken aback. Why was I so defensive? Then he raised his hand, and punched her right in the eye. She fell to the ground, and let tears slowly spill from her eyes.

I snapped, and tackled Taylor with all of my strength. I punched him over and over, letting out all of my frustration with the situation. How dare him, to hit a woman. I left his face bloody, but not before he managed to punch her again, right in the forehead. I stood up and kicked him right where it hurt the most, and looked over at Kenna in time to see her close her eyes, and her head relaxed on the sand. I started screaming, and Matthew had to pull me off of Taylor, because I had probably broken his nose, and I was punching him in the gut. He rolled over, and vomited right there on the beach. Serves him right. Matthew insisted on taking her, so I was responsible for Taylor. As soon as he left, however, I walked down the other end of the beach, leaving him gasping for air, his upper body stained in blood. I walked for hours, before returning to the hotel and sleeping.

It was the next day, I had just walked onto the beach, and I saw her sitting there, smiling at Matthew. I felt like turning around, but I didn’t. My feet willed me to move forward, with confidence. I held my chin high, and tried to ignore the fact that Kenna was wearing very little clothing. She had the most amazing legs, they were beyond what you saw on any other girl. I flashed back to the time we were in the bathroom stall at the last event, where she was sitting on top of me, and I slipped my hands up the back of her thighs, and slid carefully under her skirt.

I found myself smiling, and I dropped it.

“Nice of you to show up!” Jack J yelled and ran over, ushering me over.

I pointed to Kenna, asking loudly, “Why is she here? Um, you didn’t tell me she was here.” I felt myself blushing, and I felt like an idiot. Her eye looked terrible, and I wanted to make sure she was okay, but I resisted it. She honestly looked horrible and drained, I could tell it hurt her very much. Jack just gave me a warning look, before I saw her stand up. She starting walking towards me, I thought she was going to say something to me, but she walked right past me. What the hell? I looked behind me in wonder, and tried not to enjoy the view. She just kept walking, and walking. She was leaving! I chuckled, and Matthew jumped up quickly running after her. That was funny.

“You guys know I don’t want to be around her. She’s psycho.” I chuckled again, and sat down on the towel she had left. It was good she left, my eyes kept trying to wander on her. Minutes later, she returned. I shook my head, and readjusted my body. She walked too close by, and her foot clipped my own. God damn these big feet. I knew I should apologize, but she got up quickly and moved past me without a word.

That was another thing Jack G had told me, she didn’t talk anymore. She just didn’t, and if she did, it was a word or maybe two words. Not anything more. That was so weird, she was always so talkative and outgoing. She barely shut up before, now she rarely said a full sentence. She found a new towel and sat down, I couldn’t help but notice how great she looked in simple shorts and a tank. I shook my head and started a conversation with the Jacks about music.

“Let’s get in the water.” I heard Matt say, and the Jacks both jumped up, and removed their shirts before running to the waves. It was a perfect day out, the sun beating down on us. I looked over and saw Kenna and Matthew standing up, before she slipped off her shirt. I felt my heart slow, and my head felt like it was on fire.

She then slowly slipped off her shorts, and was left standing there in a swimsuit that suited her body perfectly. And I mean it, perfectly. I was so attracted to her, and I felt like I couldn’t control myself. I forgot how great she looked, how perfect her body was. My throat closed up and I managed to stop myself from standing up, and grabbing her to pull her close. I know it sounds bad, like I was only after the body of a girl. But I wasn’t. It’s just hard to forget how stunning someone is when you don’t see them for two months. It had been too long, and even though I hated to admit it, I missed seeing her face.

She walked out with Matthew towards the waves, and she let them swallow her up slowly. I bit my lip, and blinked a few times to try and make sure I was seeing her right. The girl I had kicked out of my apartment two months ago, was now one of the best looking girls I knew. Well, shit.