Unexpected // sm

Chapter 53

Shawn's POV

I watched her study the screen, her face scrunched in disbelief and disgust. I wondered what she was thinking. It seemed as though she didn't like the movie. I liked it. It was a classic romantic movie. Kenna's eyes slowly started to blink slower towards the middle of the movie. Eventually, she stopped blinking. Her eyes were set quiet, her face peaceful. Her mouth was open slightly and her chin was locked in place. I know it sounded silly, but the way she slept was another reason I loved her. Her face never changed from one night to another while asleep. During the day, there were probably 1,000 different expressions. But she always slept the same.

I slipped my hand across her face gently, to make sure she was actually asleep. She was. I looked over to see Elizabeth lying sprawled across the whole couch. Nash was sleeping on the floor. He would do anything for that girl. He might deny it, but he would do any single thing in the world, if she asked him too. I wish I could be that good for Kenna. I wish I could make her that happy. I wanted to. I really did. I just don't think I have it in me. I always thought from the beginning that I wasn't good enough for her. I still do.

I remember one time we were staying at my apartment. It was about a month and a half after MAGCON probably. Things were moving fast for us, but it felt right. We were old enough to know love. It wasn't a silly crush. She knew how I felt about her, I knew how she felt about me. But things were starting to slip for us. As my future got bright, we starting losing that light. One day, I was sitting on the couch watching some reality show. Kenna came up behind me and put her hands on my shoulders. "I want to go out today, maybe you can show me the city." She smiled at me and bit her lip. I quietly shook my head and sighed.

"You know I'm recording today. I told you that already." I stood up, dropping her hands from my shoulders. I didn't want to deal with this right now. I had been behind on recording as it was. My manager was starting to get pissed at me, I even quit MAGCON because I didn't have enough time working on music. The label was expecting new music soon, and I had none of it done.

"I just thought, well maybe you could go tomorrow instead. It's just one day." Her voice was quiet, but she kept her eyes on mine. This wasn't how she usually fought with me. Usually she screamed at me. But she was quiet, her face showed barely an emotion.

I rolled my eyes out of disbelief saying, "Really? My schedule doesn't revolve around making you happy, Mykenna." I couldn't miss another day, I didn't want to. Music was more important to me than she was. She could always go, music would always be my number one. I surprised myself at calling her Mykenna. I never, not in the whole time knowing her, called her that.

"I know. Nothing does." Her voice shook and she backed away from me towards the bedroom. "Could I maybe come? I've never seen you record before. You promised you'd take me sometime." Now I was royally pissed. How could I have her there? It was a place for business. It wasn't a field trip. A place where I could get away from her, basically.

"You're kidding right? You know what, I promised you a lot of things. Promises don't mean shit these days. Don't you see that?" I moved towards her. I wouldn't let her just leave this. I wasn't going to let it go now. She kept backing away, but stopped when her back met the closed bedroom door. "I don't have the time to deal with you constantly. I have to focus on my music. Why can't you understand that? Seriously!" My voice was getting louder with each word. I was inches from her face, but she was looking at the ground. "Look at me. Stop being such a coward." I grabbed her arm and she immediately looked at me. Her eyes locked on my chin, before trailing to my eyes.

"Please stop. Shawn, you're hurting me. Please." Her voice was steady but tears were falling from her eyes. I suddenly realized how tight my grip was on her arm. I pulled it away, and saw red fingerprints on her upper arm. I felt like an asshole and wanted so badly to apologize, but I had to make a point to her. She never seemed to understand what I said to her.

"See what you made me do? I'm going to the studio. I'm not coming back tonight. Maybe you shouldn't either." I regretted it as soon as I said it, but I wasn't thinking straight. I was being hard headed and I wanted to get out of there. I had backed away and grabbed my backpack that was propped against the couch. She stayed at the wall and rubbed her arm gently.

"Where are you going?" She asked, still keeping her eyes on the ground. It pissed me off that she couldn't look me in the eyes.

"Jason's having a party." I narrowed my eyes at her and flipped my hair out of my eyes. Jason was a guy I had met at a party one time about a month ago. But I wasn't really going there. I was going to see Haya again, a girl I met at the same party. She was tall, with long tan legs and straight blonde hair. Perfect body, as she was a model for some small magazines. Haya was into me, big time, and as far as she knew, I was single.

She sniffled, and wiped her cheek with her wrist, and stuttered an, "Okay." That's all she said before opening the bedroom door, and slipping inside.

Early the next morning, about 3 a.m., I came home and found her gone. Her clothes, shoes, everything. Gone. I never thought she would actually leave. It felt so empty in there, so boring. I knew she didn't want to leave. But I had told her to. Somehow, I knew she did it because she thought it would make me happy. It did for a couple hours. Then that night, it sorta just hit me. I cried for three days straight after she left. I missed every part of her, but I didn't dare ask her to come back. On the fourth day, I found an old notebook of hers. It was underneath the mattress. I didn't want to open it. I wanted to throw it away. But I felt the urge to just look at it. Sure enough, there was a small message scribbled inside. It was her hand writing.

Good luck with your music. Be HAPPY

I remember sitting there, staring at it. I couldn't believe this was all she had left for me. Nothing else to say to me. I was so angry. The tears were gone. I was ready to write some music. The next week, I wrote an entire album of music on my own. The next three weeks we recorded. It was made public, and I drew in money like crazy. At that point, that's all I had to thank her for. The only thing she had gave me. I was so stupid. I look back at it, and think, I had everything I ever wanted, and I didn't even know it.

I woke up to the sound of Elizabeth laughing. She had a very annoying laugh, that could stretch for miles. I looked around and noticed she must be upstairs. Nash was gone too. I rubbed my eyes carefully, and realized Kenna still had her head in my lap. I was supposed to leave for my flight at 7:30 this morning. Judging by the dim sunlight streaming in, it was after or close to the time. I slid my phone from my pocket to see it was 6:26. Well shit. It was an hour drive. I totally forgot about all of this.

There was no way I'd make it now. I had to try though. I tried to gently shake Kenna awake, but she didn't budge. She didn't move an inch. I tried again. Nothing. I felt a rush of worry wave over me. Then I remembered, she is a heavy sleeper these days. The pills used to force her to sleep, but without them, she sleeps even more because she's happier. I didn't have time to try and wake her, I needed to leave this second. I gently stood up and dragged her head onto a pillow instead. Still no movement. She wouldn't be up for hours. I grabbed a clean shirt from my bag and changed, then zipped it up tight.

I ran up the stairs and left a note quickly on the kitchen table for her when she woke. I didn't see Elizabeth or Nash, so I just grabbed my bag and rushed out the door. They would understand. I jumped in my old pick up, and smiled at the familiar scent that filled it. It started quickly, and I flew out of the driveway, onto the road.

I called Nash on the way there, and explained everything. Just as I had thought, they were totally okay with it. I reached the airport at 7:17, and sprinted through the place. I was surprised I got here so fast. But it wasn't like I was a slow driver. As I reached the terminal, I saw the doors still open. I reached the ramp, and gave my ticket to the worker standing there. She smiled at me and waved me down the ramp. Within ten minutes, the plane was flowing down the runway, and I was on my way home. I didn't have anything on my mind, other than wondering how long it would be until I could see my Kenna again.