always raining - Poetry

empty soul like me

inspired by U2 who's going to ride your wild horses

i saw a pretty gem at the bottom of a dirty river - and i reached for it with my shaking hands - clutching it desperately i found shards of glass surrounding it -that cut my hands - left blood in the stream - dirt got into my veins

did you know you were dangerous? you're an accident waiting to happen

snakes on a trail i really want to go down

ghosts in a house i really want to make my home

glass on a beach while i walk barefoot

and - i'm foolish enough to do it anyway

don't call me a martryr - i'm just a lost soul - aiming to feel anything - something - to remind me that i'm alive - i barely even mind the flush of dirty water that comes in - as long as i can feel the brief touches of the ocean - maybe this is my fault

i left myself open to let you in - the doors i opened - can't be closed now - to your credit you came willing - saw my own ghosts and fought your way through to the core of me - being followed by some of your own demons - and shadows you weren't even aware of -

your presence lingers - but this faint version of you is not enough - and every time you leave - you take my heart with you - leaving an empty hole for any empty soul to fill - and they're so h u n g r y

and i don't mind, fighting your demons and mine - and you don't mind - but i am t i r e d

oh - and the deeper i go - the more that i know - you are all that there is - if loving you is a sin - call me a sinner - i'll willingly walk into this haunted house and fight my way through - i just hope i don't lose myself along the way

if i give up and leave - i don't worry about myself - ill be okay, i like loneliness, it's what i'm used to - i just worry about you

who's gonna climb your highest mountains - an arduous task i still have yet to complete - to figure out who you are - analyze the shadow on the other side - and meditate on what irks you and makes you who you are?

who's gonna swim in the ocean of your soul the way i have? flailing most times, sometimes drowning, very few times enjoying the sun - it's mostly night time where you are - but i love stargazing so i don't mind.

who's gonna dance in your eyes like i have? a flickering flame for hours and hours in hope of your brief.flickering.gaze?

and who else will bask in your light? suntanning like i have, so thirsty - like a moth to a flame?

if you will have that with someone else, i willingly release you, because that is what you deserve

true love a l l o w s - and isn't forceful

just know - every day - i say your name