Dasey (Derek and Casey) Life With Derek

Doing the Work.

I decided Cody deserved an explanation and not to be stood up and put on a beige tank top with blue jeans and headed out. I met him and he was waiting at this cute diner named granny's. He looked so nice with a blue t-shirt and jeans,he waved me over and I sat down.

"You look pretty Casey".

"Thank you so do you".

"Um...haha thank you".

"I mean handsome".

"Haha well thank you".

Right as I was about to say something a waitress walked up to us and asked us for our orders and Cody ordered just eggs for both of us asking me if I minded and I didn't.Good idea it's light on the stomach.

"C-Cody listen I need to confess something".

But as I was about to tell him, he put his hand on mine and smiled.I felt so guilty also the music playing made me feel worse and mad at myself.This could've been something if I hadn't messed it up! He noticed my forced smile and pulled back.

"What's wrong Casey?".

"I got dumped and Tess dragged me out to cheer me up and-".

"I get it!".

He didn't need anymore information and the look on his face said it all. I told him I'll leave but he smiled and asked me about the break up,if it was someone he knew? I made up a lie and said it was someone back home which was not a total lie. I explained how not many people wanted us together,how we fought but no matter what others got in the way. He just listened to me and I felt horrible this was a date and I turned it into a therapy session.

Our eggs came and  we ate and he continued listening.When I finished he was smiling and told me I was in the baby steps of a break up,he was nice and kind also told me it was great that I explained it to him.He wasn't happy that I used him but he said he liked being used a bit. We laughed and he said I should start finding myself outside of this ex and I realized that this was a pattern! I did this in high school with Max,I became a cheerleader to better fit with him and almost gave up all my interests to compete with his ex.I pushed myself so hard that I became allergic to my boyfriend.

God why did I do this? do I not think I'm good enough!? I told Cody how I did this before and he said that I was afraid of the person I'm with losing interest so I moulded myself into who I thought they were into.

"But that's one soon to be therapists opinion I am still unlicensed haha".

"Yeah but I feel like you hit a nerve".

"Well then I hope I helped a bit".

"You've given me a lot to think about".

Once we finished eating I offered to pay for my share but Cody said it was on the house. He also said he was a shoulder to cry on if I needed it and a friend. I told him the same and that if he ever needed to vent that I was here as well and we hugged then parted ways.I felt lighter and happier,still awful but better.