Crossing the line (COMPLETED)

Chapter thirty nine: Reasons

SYD

"L-lahat na ba 'to, Lori?" I can't help not to stammer upon reading the reports Lori gave me.

"Yes." napasuntok ako sa lamesa at napaiyak. Hindi ko inisip na ganito ang pinagdaanan niya. "Syd, you've been through a lot also. Don't blame yourself as if ginusto mo yan!"

Pinagsusuntok ko ang pader out of frustation and anger. I hired a private investigator to know what happen to Em in the past two years. Ang tanga ko na hindi naisip agad iyon bago ako nagpakita sa kanya. Tama si D, I am so fucked up and not deserved Em. I didn't know na ganito katindi ang pinagdaanan niya. It breaks my heart imagining how she cope up and able to handle all the shits happen to her. Pero ang pinaka iniinda ko ay ang mga attempted suicides niya. I can't even bear to read how many times she did that. And how she able to survive it.

"Did you look the property that I told you?" inabutan ako ni Lori ng towel para balutin ang kamay kong dumudugo na. I drink the liquour she offer me too, to calm my nerves.

"Yes, it's all under you now. Nailipat lahat ng assets as per the will stated. It's vacant right now." napapikit ako, kahit patay na si Dad he still made me suffer of all this shits that he done.

Hanggang kailan ako magsasakripisyo at magiging miserable dahil sa kanya.

"Paki-ayos Lori. Make sure to talk to the engineering team for the best design theh have. If its possible to restore like it was before. That's the least I can do for her."

"You think it's okay? I mean, they said that she can't bear to bake again. Do you want to provoke her?"

"I just want it to be ready, Lori. I will help her to go back to what she is before."

"And you? How about you?!"

"It doesn't matter what happens to me! She's the one who's important, Lori!"

"Tss. You already suffered and take all the consequence, Syd. Hindi lang siya. And stop taking all the blame! Kaya ba hindi ka na rin umaatend ng theraphy sessions mo? Lia is worried about you, so do I. Stop torturing yourself, because it's not your fucking fault!"

Inis na nilayasan niya ako. Bumalik sa isipan ko ang nakaraan, dahilan kung bakit hindi ako nakabalik agad kay Em.

Napaigik ako ng sunod-sunod na suntok ang pinatama ng mga tauhan ni Dad sa akin. Galit na galit siya matapos malaman na hindi na ako pwedeng magpakasal kay Lia. Bukod pa sa pag-ayaw ni Lia sa kasal. He thought I told it to her, that I am already married to someone that's why she called the wedding off. Iyon na ang pinalabas namin para hindi madamay ang pamilya ni Lia to my father's wrath.

"Magaling ka, I give you credit to that. But you will not win over me." nilapag niya ang papel sa harap ko. "Pirmahan mo yan."

Kahit na hilo ay nakuha kong basahin ang nakasulat dun. Divorce paper with my wife.

"You think I will sign to that?" napangisi ako sa kanya. "I wouldn't marry her, kung hihiwalayan ko lang. Tigilan na natin 'to Dad." nanghihina na rin akong kalabanin siya in my fucking mind, I'm still thinking he is my father.

"That's what I am doing. Sign this now and it all will be over. Marry Eric Laxamana- - - . . ."

"Fuck it Dad! Stop using me with your illegal deeds!" napaiyak na ko, hindi makapaniwala sa sinasabi niya.

"This is also for you! Sino ba ang magmamana ng lahat ng ito kundi ikaw! Idiot!"

"I don't want any of this! Mamatay na lang ako sa hirap at gutom kesa manahin ko ang lahat ng galing sa'yo mula sa illegal!"