Confessions of a Queen Bee

Chapter 35

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I haven't gone to school again, it's a nightmare all this time I'm missing. But I have actually been doing work at home and I've been going to Dr Halpin and talking on the phone to Mrs Granger the last couple of days. So, I feel as if it's not as unproductive than the last few times I haven't turned up to school.

It wasn't even by choice this time, Lotta had suggested I stay home because they still hadn't been able to arrest Layton and the risk he would turn up at school was too high. This meant however my mum or dad would feel obliged to stay with me during the day as the Layton knows of two places I may be: school or home.

I've been stressing about their jobs, I know their work can't be being as understanding as they both tell me they are.

I've been reading the homework Dr Halpin set me, we even went through it together Monday. It made me cry the first five times I read it through, but I don't cry anymore. Which kind of shows me I'm getting there. Like the aim was to desensitise me a little to the event, so I don't have such a negative reaction to having to talk about it. It's all making sense which makes me feel positive.

My mum slept in my bed on Saturday and Sunday, because I've been terrified. On the first night we even woke up to my dad camped out on the floor. I don't think they're necessarily afraid of Layton themselves, I think they're just afraid what will happen to me if I see him again. I don't think they trust me when I say I'm doing ok. I don't blame them I guess.

I haven't been sleeping, not really. On Monday my mum slept in her room with my dad and I didn't want to tell them that no, actually I'm not fine to sleep on my own. So, I've been having a full-on disaster every night. I'm scared he will get to me somehow and I just wish I had someone here with me.

It is currently Wednesday and I'm waiting for Nora to come and drop of the worksheets I've been waiting for the past few days. I haven't seen her since Friday and I haven't seen Jackson since that Saturday morning. I haven't been on my phone either so I know they've probably been trying to get in touch. My mum phoned Mrs Granger and got her to organise Nora to drop of some stuff.

I know I should reply to people, I know I should check my phone but I'm scared Layton will text me. Which I know is stupid, for him to be any more likely to text me than he was before. He's knows my number. But it's almost as if I can feel as if he is closer to me. That he's in the same town. I don't know. It's just scary.

I think that's fair right? To be scared. I never know when my fear is rational anymore.

Jayden's been popping in after school, literally just for a snack and to check I am ok. He's been great but he says it's very strange at school without me there and like actually knowing what's going on with me.

He said that the boys have noticed that I'm not there and have been bugging Jackson about it. But Jackson doesn't reply to them. Apparently, he's been rather silent and missing lately. Jay assures me that he hasn't told Jackson about Layton being back but that apparently, he's definitely noticed the police at school.

There's been officers at school in case Layton turns up. I'm supposed to be going back tomorrow but I can't imagine being there. The thought being terrifying.

"Ivy, Nora's here." My dad shouts up the stairs and I jump off my bed and head downstairs. It's his job to babysit me today.

"Coming!" I say as I run down the stairs actually happy to see someone else other than the usual. Even if she come baring school work.