Oblivious~Changlix✔

A/N

Sorry about this rant, you obviously don't have to read, I'm just explaining why I have been having really slow updates.

If you're wondering why I havent been updating (which no one probably is) I've been feeling really sad about Changlix lately. Not because of anything in particular, but just because I love Felix more than anything and I feel like he is getting hurt. For people who haven't noticed, Felix has scars on his arms that are most likely from self harm. His first ones appeared after he got eliminated, but he had a lot of them in the summer of 2019, so this fanfic has some reality to it. People don't know how Felix really feels, so I don't know what happened that triggered him, or if they are in fact self inflicted, but based on my own prior knowledge, I think they are.

He's talked with Changbin before about how his family isn't proud of him, and I think he struggles a lot. Chan had even mentioned in interviews that Changbin and Felix both have struggled with mental health. I feel like something definitely happened in 2019, but I am glad that Felix has Chan.

I know some people ship Chanlix, but I really do think they are just brothers, like they both have said. I watched the 2 Kids Room+1 with them and Seungmin and it was so pure. Their relationship is adorable, and Chan is the best brother to Lix. I just have been feeling like this book has some realistic qualities, that are making me sad.

Another thing is Changjin. I feel like in the 2 Kids Room+1 a lot of stuff was taken out of context by people, and I think some stuff got cut out. Tbh, though I feel like everyone was like "Oh, Changjin is real" but I honestly think it was Changlix who had more moments. After Changbin says that he is affectionate towards Felix, but he only is to Hyunjin from hatred (obviously he was just joking) but I think some part of it was him protecting Lix, because after that he says, "Do you know what that means?" to Felix and Felix says he does. Also when Felix is trying to ask if he saved Hyunjin instead, Changbin immediately says, "I said I would save you!" It sounded reassuring, but also like he was mad that Felix would even ask.

I feel like, as I've said in this book before, a lot of Changjin is fanservice. I think they are good friends who just flirt a lot. I feel like they have a lot of parallels to Taekook vs. Jikook. What I mean is that Jikook flirt and are more physical and out there(Changjin), while Taekook are more secretive(Changlix)which I don't think is always their choice. I believe that Taekook are real, as their are a lot of reasons to, and Jimin is just a flirty person who loves affection, similar to Hyunjin.

I think that Changlix has been making me sad lately because everyone keeps saying like "Changlix is dead!" and "Changlix broke up!" I guess stuff like that gets on my nerves, because it's obviously not dead, and it probably never will be. What I mean by that is that even if they are just friends, their love for each other is real, even if it is just platonic.

I honestly love Changlix with all my heart, and Changjin kinda makes me angry, because I feel like it hurts Felix, and I want to protect him and I never want him to be sad. Maybe I am weird, but I am just feeling down about it, and I feel like writing an angsty fanfic about it, so I might start a new one soon.

I might sound dramatic, but as someone who struggles with mental health, and someone who's family also struggles with it, I cry about Changlix sometimes. I obviously don't know what goes on off camera, but I think something happened with Changlix after they debuted. I think they got told to not be as obvious, because Felix is the most popular member and it was suspicious.

I sometimes watch old videos from when they were so pure and happy, because I miss it. I just think that Felix deserves the whole world, and I honestly care about him. I love Binnie, too, but I think he is a little oblivious (no pun intended) sometimes. I know that a lot of people think it is one-sided, but I don't.

One reason I think people might see it that way is because of how clingy Felix is. I believe that since Felix was raised in Australia where homosexuality isn't as frowned upon as it is in Korea, where Binnie was raised. I think Binnie is less affectionate to Felix, publicly, than he is to Hyunjin, is because he is afraid of how he feels about Felix. This is all obviously my insights, observations, and opinions, so don't get all salty.

One more thing I want to quickly address is Woojin. I didn't include him in this book because he isn't part of the group anymore. Another reason I didn't include him, was because writing about him would make me sad. I know that what I said about him leaving in the book is almost certainly not what happened IRL. Chan talks about it in a Vlive, and he doesn't explicitly say it's about Woojin but he heavily implies it.

Another point I want to bring up is Chan. I am a multi-stan, but I think Chan is one of the best leaders in Kpop. He deserves the whole world, and to become 200× as successful as they already are. He is so pure and happy, and also so hardworking. He built this team and he worked hard to have them debut as nine. The reason I think Chan is so impressive is because he not only leads the group, but he also composes their music(with the other members of 3RACHA)and he comes up with some of my favorite choreography parts of theirs.

This is super long already, but I want to end by saying that I will support all the boys no matter what, and that you should do the same. If Changjin or any other of the ships ends up being real, I will support it, because I love the boys. I hope everyone is doing okay, and I want to say that you can always message me if you need to, and I will try to be helpful, or we can just fangirl/fanboy together.