Just Bandmates? || A Jikook Story

~Chapter 61~

Jimin's POV

I got up and went to get the rest of the members. They were all still standing by the front door in silence. "Okay, I need you guys to come with me. We are going to do something with Jungkook," I said. "Okay," Yoongi said. The rest of them nodded and I took them to the living room.

"Okay, everyone please sit down and I will explain everything about what's going on with Jungkook unless he wants to?" I asked. He shook his head.

"Okay, so Jungkook and I played a game. I said a word and he said the first thing that came to mind, then he expanded on the thoughts later. The topics I said were: the trip, Namjoon-Hyung, Jin-Hyung, army, and me. Now I'm not going to expand on his answers, but he is going to.

I'm again going to say a topic, but this time when Jungkook answers he is going to pick anyone to talk to about it too. And yes Jungkook, you can pick the same member more than once. Now everyone else, when and if Jungkook says something, don't tell him otherwise, just comfort him. For example, if he says Army is disappointed in him, don't say they aren't, just comfort him and say it's okay or something like that. I'm going to do 4 topics and after I will tell you the rest. Okay?" I asked.

Everyone agreed and we could start the game. "Actually, Jungkook I'm going to repeat a few of the topics we did earlier. Is that okay?" I asked him. "Ya," he muttered. "Okay, let's do Namjoon-Hyung," I said. I know he already did this one, but I want him to talk to Namjoon about it.

"Displeased, disappointed," he said. "Okay now, who would you like to talk about it too. If you don't want to talk about it yet you don't have to, but you'll have to by the end of this game," I said. He looked around the room at everyone. I could tell he wanted to pick me, but I wanted him to pick Namjoon and talk to him about it.

To my surprise, he said, "Namjoon-Hyung." "Alright you guys can go in a different room and take as much time as you need," I said. They both nodded and stood up, walking to a different room.

Jungkook's POV

Namjoon and I walked to his studio and sat down on his couch. "Jungkook talk to me," he said. I sighed. I was again doing the same thing I did with Jimin. I want to talk, but words aren't coming out. I calmed myself, hoping it would make talking a little easier.

"Um, I-I feel like y-you are disappointed in m-me. I'm supposed to stay strong and I literally broke down in the middle of the airport. Not to mention I made us come back to Korea and got Jimin-Hyung and me in a car crash. You are probably so disappointed in me. I can't even believe you're talking to me," I started to cry.

"Jungkook-ah it's okay. Come here," he said opening his arms. He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight until I calmed down. "Are you ready to go back now?" he asked. To be honest I completely forgot about that. I already feel better just talking about one topic. Now I have to do three more.

I nodded and Namjoon and I walked back to the living room. My eyes were probably red and my cheeks puffy. "Okay Jungkook, next topic," Jimin said. I looked at him wondering what it was going to be. "Dancing and Singing," Jimin said. "A lot," I said. "Pick your person," Jimin said.

I wanted to pick Jimin, but my mind went to Hoseok. I don't know why, but it just did. "Hobi-Hyung," I said. "Okay," Jimin said. I stood up and walked to Hoseok's studio, while he followed behind me.

"Okay Jungkook, what do you mean by a lot?" he asked me. "Well before I broke down in Illinois, I felt different. When we first arrived in the U.S, I had started to feel a little different, but I didn't want to tell anyone. I started to lose the passion to perform and be with army. I was going to talk to Jimin-Hyung, but things kept getting in the way. And before I knew it, practice was over and it was all too much.

I just.. I don't know, I needed a break I guess, which caused a lot of problems. Dancing gets repetitive and so does singing. The only thing that really changes is where we are in the world. I hate saying this, but eventually, army gets to be the same. I love army, but we need to have more fan to idol interactions, or else it gets boring," I said. I almost started crying, but I held it back.

"It's okay Jungkook. Are you okay?" he asked. I just shrugged my shoulders. If said I was okay, we wouldn't be doing this, but if I said no he would be even more worried. We sat there for a few more seconds before I stood up and walked out. I managed to keep my tears in this time.

I know I shouldn't, but I don't want to cry in front of them. "Alright, now let's do the trip," Jimin said. "Namjoon-Hyung," I quickly said. I immediately stood up and walked to his studio, not leaving anytime for anyone to process anything. I didn't even say a word, but I wasn't going back.

As soon as Namjoon closed the door I broke down. I couldn't keep the tears in anymore. Namjoon rushed over to me and hugged me tightly again. He didn't say anything and held me until I calmed down. After a while, I calmed down and was finally able to talk.

"Okay Jungkook, the trip," Namjoon said. "I feel like the trip is too much. I want to just stay at home. Going on the trip makes me feel like I am leaving Jimin. I just know I am going to be worrying about him too much. And nothing anyone could do would stop me from worrying about him. The reason I keep my feelings in or build a wall is so I don't become a burden to anyone," I said.

"It's okay Jungkook, let's just finish this up okay?" he asked. I nodded and we walked back out to the living room. "Okay then the last topic is Army," Jimin said. "Too many words to say," I said. I looked around the room at everyone again. I'm not going to pick Tae or Hoseok. They don't fit this topic. I already talked to Jimin earlier, so I won't pick him. Not Jin either.

That leaves Yoongi or Namjoon. I sat there thinking about who would be better, but either one of them could work. "Okay Jungkook, do you have it narrowed down?" Jin asked me. "Yoongi-Hyung or Namjoon-Hyung," I said.

"You can do both if you want," Jimin suggested. I nodded and stood up. I walked back to Namjoon's studio and sat down on his couch for the third time. "Okay Jungkook, what do you mean by too many words?" Yoongi asked.

"Words cannot, and I mean cannot, explain how I think army feels. They probably think I'm a baby and don't deserve to be in the group. They probably wouldn't mind if I wasn't in the group. They most likely hate me and will look down upon me, which will end up bringing the group down. Ending up in the whole world hating us because of me and my stupid mistake to let everything out," I said.

"Jungkook, is that all you want to say? If there's anything else now is the time to say it," Namjoon asked. I went through my thoughts and everything I had been keeping inside of me was finally out. At least one person in Bangtan knew how I felt about one thing or another. "No," I said. "Okay then, let's go back to the rest of the group," Namjoon said.

We all stood up and sat back down in the living room. "Who's ready for part two of our game?" Jimin asked.