Make Me (MxM)

Twenty-one

Seth's POV:

It was around 5 am, when the apartment's door finally opened. I was sitting in my armchair for the longest time, finally home, yet nothing about this really calmed my nerves. I wasn't exactly upset either just... Disturbed. I guess it's no surprise after the events of yesterday, and before that. 

I woke up around 3 am, and I noticed that Jude wasn't home, which first gave me a brief one hour of total panic, then I started drinking, because that seemed like something a logical, and responsible adult man would do. 

I didn't know where he went in the middle of the night, and why. Why wouldn't he tell me? Is he gone forever? No... that's absurd. 

People say you shouldn't drink after taking painkillers, but I say, it's the only way of taking them. My back hurt like a bitch, especially because I refused to let Jude guide me around in the house, and just with the support of my stick, it wasn't easy to do even simple every-day tasks. 

So that's how I got here. 5 am, with a glass of wine in hand, staring into the abyss while waiting for the demon to return like a left-at-home-puppy. Never in my life, felt I so humiliated by my own damn self. 

My eyes shot to the door when it slowly opened, and Jude slipped in through, obviously aiming to keep quiet since he presumed I was asleep.  His steps silent,  as if his feet didn't even touch the ground. 

"Hi" I broke the silence, catching his attention, but he didn't even flinch as a normal human being would, when suddenly they hear a voice, they weren't supposed to. 

As he turned towards me, his gaze first found the wine-glass then my face, and he pressed his lips together in disapproval, as he made his way to me, stopping just before he would literally bump into my knees. 

His smell now hit me easier, even though he wasn't as close, but I soon realized it's because it wasn't the scent I usually feel. 

It was smoke, which started a strange fear reaction in me, and slowly turned into flashbacks of the Harvis mansion remains settling in my stomach with an odd uneasiness.  

"Where were you?" I asked quietly, letting my eyes meet his. I already knew he was about to lie, I could tell from his face. He rarely ever tried to hide it. 

"Urgent Meeting"

"With a fireplace?" I guessed, a little irritated. I was angry that he left without a word. It was awful to wake up alone in this house, and I somehow speculated that he had left me for good. However, I couldn't show these thoughts, so I just acted as if I was angry for some other reason. 

A small smile appeared on his lips, and in the dim lighting of the room, it created a small dimple on his face that gave an oddly soft look to his usually sharp and dark features. 

"Seth" he called out to me as if I wasn't already paying attention to his presence. I bore my eyes into him, tilting my head to the side a little. 

He raised his hand, and gently traced my jawline with his index finger, before continuing... Or so I thought he will. But he didn't say anything at all, he was looking at me as if he had known everything and nothing about me. If I didn't know any better, I would've thought he meant to show me, he wouldn't leave me. His features were different than before... they held a strange sense of vulnerability, that he rarely ever showed.

We stayed silent even while he brought me back to my bed to fall back asleep. 

**

With 4 painkillers and a lot of quiet cursing, I got through the day. It was complete and utter misery, and mainly not because of my back, but because people were caught up in all sorts of dramas. Veronica was "kidnapped by her stalker", and a church burned down nearby, not to mention the Harvis mansion's tragedy, that occurred recently too. I kept hearing stupid conversations and "rest in peace"-s from random people, who didn't give a fuck about Veronica at all, before this happened. Same was with Adam. No one liked him until I accidentally ended his life, and I'm sure not many of them knew those millionaires that had their very last meal with Harvis.