lost and Found |Taekook|

12. Questions

A big thanks to sunflowerkoo for the cover, for being my best beta and for literally everything you do for me.❤

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"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Yerim says, now paying attention to Jungkook.

"It's hypothetical."

"Okay."

"Don't think too much into it." Yerim looks confused, it's never hypothetical after you say it.

"K' I won't," Yerim says, swirling her folk into the noodles that she got for lunch.

Jungkook takes a moment to think then, trying to form a coherent question which would not raise any suspicion on him.

"Would you forgive someone if they cheated on you?" Jungkook asks, his lunch long forgotten. He clasps his hands and tucks them into the middle of his thighs, a nervous action.

Yerim's eyebrow shoots up at that, she is caught off guard by the question but she composes herself quickly. Moments pass between them and she keeps quiet, seeming to think about her answer.

"It depends," she says, finally.

"Nothing ever concrete comes after 'depends'." Jungkook tries not to roll his eyes at her. He wants clarity and so far Yerim looks like she's going to confuse Jungkook more.

"Listen to me, will you?" Jungkook nods, giving her a thumbs up.

"Cheating on someone is not just breaking their trust, it's so much more, Jungkook-ah. When you cheat on someone you break their self esteem, you make them unforgiving, hateful, hurtful, and possibly all the negative things in between." Yerim takes her time answering Jungkook's question, she swirls her fork again to take a bite of her noodles.

"If someone makes you go through all these emotions then it's hard to forgive them, almost impossible," Yerim says, looking into Jungkook's eyes.

"But I'd still forgive them." She drops her fork back into the plate and picks up a tissue to wipe her hands.

"You would?" Jungkook frowns, puzzled as to why would someone do that.

"Yes I would, I'd forgive them for myself and not for them."

Oh

"How'd I move on, if I don't forgive them?"

"No, but would you take them back in your life?" Jungkook asks, this is the question that has been bugging him for a long time.

Would Taehyung take me back in his life?

"That depends too," Yerim says, a smile making its way to her lips when Jungkook rolls his eyes at her. Jungkook doesn't need any 'depends' or 'maybes' in his life.

"It depends on how much I love them and how much they're willing to make improvements. It's not the damage that matters, it's damage control."

"And what if all the doors of damage control are closed?"

"Then you wait for the doors to open, and if that doesn't happen, you move on. No matter what happens, you'll have to respect their decision." This is why Jungkook admires Yerim, she is giving him sides of the coin that Jungkook never thought existed.

"Can I ask you one more question?" Jungkook has lost his appetite, he makes a metal note to get his lunch packed. Yerim on the other hand looks like she is done with eating.

"Yes, but make it fast. I don't want Eunha to be mad at us."

"Would you forgive yourself if you cheated on someone?" Jungkook tries to make sense out of his questions. He, himself, was never able to forgive for what he did to Taehyung. There's no way you can forgive yourself for hurting someone you love.

However, Yerim does not think like that. She drums her index fingers on the table, "Forgiving myself would be the most rational thing to do, you can't hold on to the person you don't love, so yes, I'd forgive myself."

"What do you mean 'not love'?"

"Jungkook-ah, you don't cheat on the people you love," she says, making it seem like the most obvious thing. Jungkook is dumbfounded and irked at Yerim for saying such a thing.

"But I love him!" He doesn't even realize when it slips last his lips. Fuck. Jungkook quickly slaps his mouth shut.

"I mean hypothetically, what if I love them?" Yerim narrows her eyes at Jungkook, knowingly. He knows he slipped, he knows Yerim is smart enough to catch that, but she doesn't comment on that. Jungkook let's out a nervous laugh to cover up.

"If you have to cheat on the person you love then there are faults in you, there are faults in the relationship,"

"If you go and seek comfort on the outside, then it means that the walls of your own home were never warm."

Jungkook hates to know that Yerim is right. Love is never enough, sure it's necessary, but never enough. Taehyung and Jungkook's relationship was shallow. The day when Jungkook went and kissed Minsun, it wasn't like he didn't love Taehyung, he did. But that night love wasn't something that Jungkook was looking for, he was seeking for comfort, warmth, longing. The day Jungkook went and kissed Minsun, he was just lonely.

"Can we leave now, or do you have more questions?" Yerim chuckles, and pats on Jungkook's shoulders as she gets up. Jungkook nods and follows her suit, but his mind is lost again. Talking to Yerim has given him a lot of options to think about.

Their hospital is only a rough seven minutes walk from the deli. Jungkook pays the bill and gets his lunch packed. He decides to drop the topic, more comfortable with walking in silence. However, Yerim has never been the one to keep quiet and drop the topic.

She slings her arm over Jungkook's shoulder, raising a little bit on her feet because she is shorter than Jungkook. She often does that and Jungkook always laughs at her foolish attempts to look tall. He never stops her though, let's her do whatever she wants.

"We're humans Jungkookie, we mess up, fuck up and we make mistakes, but what's more important is how we control the damage we've done." Jungkook knows this, he has heard this a multiple times before, but he's not sure if he can apply this to his situation.

"Thanks for coming to my ted talk," she says, squeezing Jungkook's shoulder, giving him a bright smile.

Jungkook rolls his eyes at her, swatting her hand away, "Delete this conversation from your head."

"I'd never, especially when I know who you are talking about," she says, eyebrows raised, giving a creepy smile to Jungkook.

"What do you mean?" Jungkook already has an idea what she means. She is smart enough to figure out the unsaid.

"You're talking about you and the handsome man that visited you yesterday, aren't you?" How the hell does she know that?

"Did you eavesdrop on us!?"

"I didn't mean to! I was coming to say 'hi', but you looked sad so I eavesdropped. I'm sorry." She quickly says. They've reached the hospital and Jungkook just wants to be alone for a while. This is getting overwhelming for him.

"Can we drop this for now, I'll tell you everything later." Jungkook hates to see the concerned look that Yerim is giving him. But he just wants to stop talking or thinking about Taehyung.

"Okay I'll see you later, bye."

"Bye"

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Ngl I had to do some research for this chap so i don't pass on the wrong idea on cheating and emotions of both the parties come out clear.

Thoughts?