Forget Me Not✓| Yoonmin(+18)

chapter seventeen (part two)

He shakes his head. "no. he was always enthusiastic to know about his other daddy before. Apparently his friend's parents at school went through a divorce and the father got full custody not letting her see her mother. Joon thinks it's gonna happen to us too."

I lick my lips trying to find the right words. "maybe it's for the best...I don't think that bunny's the best dad out there, you know?"

He frowns at me. "how can you tell? He's never tried."

I roll my eyes. "asked and answered. Never tried."

he stares intensely into my eyes. "I believe in second chances yoon. You should too."

my heart drops at the double meaning behind his words. He's oblivious or doesn't care about my face falling, instead stands up and gets my towel. "you done?"

"I'm gonna come out myself...can you wait outside?"

I'm so weak my body's shaking but I need to be alone a bit. I don't want him seeing my body too. I've lost a lot of weight and I'm insecure about the way I look.

He puts the towel on the counter for me and leaves without a word.

When I go out with shaky legs, ready to collapse at any second, he strides over to me quickly, taking my arm and sitting me down at the bed. He gets another towel, drying my hair in silence. He's not frowning and doesn't seem mad but I feel like shit.

He puts his fingers through my wet hair and butterflies flap their wings furiously in my stomach. "it's gotten so long...do you want a haircut? we could go tomorrow."

I nod, not looking him in the eyes. He continues drying my hair with the towel gently. "you know you can talk to me about anything, right?"

I'm surprised at the sudden question, looking up. he sees my questioning eyes and leaves the towel on my head, going towards my closet. "your therapist called me to say you refuse to talk to him when things get personal and he can't help you if you keep doing that."

I scoff. "I don't need his help. I'm doing just fine on my own."

He puts my clothes beside me on the bed with an unnecessary amount of force, his lips pursed together. He looks at me with anger in his eyes. "that only proves you're not. We're wasting time here if you're gonna bottle up everything again and relapse again a few years down the road...or maybe months. Do you want that?"

Tears sting my eyes and I flinch at the cruelty in his words...and the truth.

"put them on. I'm gonna check on the soup." He leaves the room without another word.

I put my clothes on and lie down on the bed, crying but wiping my tears with harshly. I put the blanket over my face to not face him if he comes back.

I'm sensitive after all the pain and mental instability and I'm not used to being scolded by him...

He just confirmed my worst nightmares; he said he's wasting his time on me...he knows I'm hopeless too.

The door opens and without turning the light on, he put the tray on the bedside table.

I try to sniff quietly so he'll leave, thinking I'm asleep.

not successful.

He gets under the blanket, coming close to me. light suddenly blinds my eyes and I groan. "what the..."

He chuckles. "wanted to see you moping in in good lighting."

I get used to his phone's flashlight and look at his smiling face. he comes closer and I can feel his breath on my face. he puts his hand on my cheek and my heart beats so fast it's gonna explode. My eyes can't see him clearly anymore since he's so close and I'm waiting for it...

He kisses my cheek, don't get me wrong it feels great, and I'm disappointed. He giggles at my expression but gets serious seconds after. "did you think about what I told you? you gotta start somewhere yoon."

I gulp and try to turn my back to him to avoid the conversation but he comes so close our bodies are glued and he wraps his hands around me, pulling my head to his chest, putting his chin on my head. His phone is on the mattress, lighting up under the blanket.

I'm silent, shocked at his touchiness. I choke on the air when he starts kissing my head and caressing my hair. "you can start by talking to me." his voice's soft and sweet, encouraging my eyes to tear up.

I would feel aroused when this close to him in normal circumstances but now I'm nothing but an emotional mess.

He shushes me when he hears my loud breathing, rubbing my back. I'm crying uncontrollably now, not remembering the last time someone showed me affection like this.

My life before dad took me away was a disaster of negligence and mom, although accepting me and doing everything a mom should for me, never showed me much physical affection or affection at all. That's why I was always thirsty for her praises and tried to be perfect to get it.

I was always an ass to everyone so no one else did it too. I don't plan on being an asshole but it comes naturally to me, pushing people away so I don't have to deal with feelings and intimacy. jimin doesn't leave me when I'm being an ass, instead, he gets closer to break my shell.

Jimin is my first in everything and I don't know if he knows it.

"it's ok. Talk to me. it'll feel better I promise."

I choke on my tears. "I...I don't know...w...where to start and...and I don't want to scare you away!"

He chuckles softly and jokes. "nothing will...unless you murdered someone...then we'll just have to take care of the body."

I can't laugh and I just get these words out before I pass out from the panic attack and the fever consuming me again. "my biological mom...she was a prostitute."