Forget Me Not✓| Yoonmin(+18)

chapter twenty nine (part one)

"are you giving me silent treatment? It burned that bad, huh?" do I hate his deep voice now? Nah.

I just continue watching TV, keeping an eye on the clock to see when I should go pick up joon from his playdate at his friend's house.

Since they've been back a few days ago, he's been nothing but a dick to me though I try my best to avoid him; he's always whispering hurtful shit in my ear, looking down on me like I'm a chewed gum on the underside of his shoe....

And I'm trying so hard no to give in and go low like him but my patience is wearing thin and the things he says...they hit deep.

I stand up, deciding to go to the gym for the two hours I have to wait for joon. we're alone in the house today and there's no Jimin to glare at him for being rude.

He comes after me to my room, taking the sleeve of my hoodie, tugging hard. "was the handjob not the kind you're used to? Or are you usually on the giving side and don't know how it should feel?"

I try to free myself cause my heartbeat is picking up in anger and sadness, and my fists itch to hit something and that's something...cause I rarely feel like being violent even verbally.

But he tugs again, making me almost lose balance. "are you that desperate for dick to act like a little bitch? I bet there are people dying to fuck that pretty face..."

Slap!

I gasp, holding my stinging hand to my chest, not believing that I turned and slapped the attitude out of THE kim taehyung, causing him to look bewildered, his head tilted to his right as he stomachs the new turn of events.

But I'm not done. The pent up anger from the last days shows itself. "being different doesn't mean you have the right to act like a prick...also, if someone likes you it doesn't mean they'll take whatever shit you throw at them...so just FUCK OFF I'm SICK OF YOU!"

I push past him, bumping my shoulder to his as I take my car keys and rush out of the house, tears streaming down my face and my palm stinging from the strong blow.

***

I'm not blind; I see Yoongi watching my every move like I'm made of glass. It stresses me out, making it harder to make my decision; legally, I have the right to get an abortion before I finish the 20th week but I'm not gonna do that to Yoongi.

He seems so hopeful, forgetting all about his own problems, only staring at me dreamily when he's home. He gives me my vitamins and all that shit I need to take right on the clock.

I have to decide and soon. It can't go on any longer. It'll just be harder for him to accept if I start to show and he keeps on daydreaming about a blue and yellow nursery...

So I stay up at night, far from Yoongi in our bed while I rub mindlessly at my stomach, crying about the situation I'm in. I thought I was way over my trauma but it seems like it still rules over me.

I scroll through pictures of a newborn joon, tae's excited but tired smile and my pale face and baggy empty eyes.

Tae was so scared of the way I refused to breastfeed joon at times, calmly listening to him crying his eyes out in hunger and not moving an inch.

I know my fear's irrational; this time everything's ideal for me and the father of my kid is actually happy about me being pregnant but it took me so much time to get back to normal...what if I become depressed again and neglect joon too?

"don't be scared...I'll be with you every second of the way...that's if you decide to keep them of course..." he's quick to add the last sentence with a pale face. I smile weakly at him, my eyes getting glossy. "I'm so sorry I'm putting you in this position...aren't you upset with me?"